Wednesday, September 18, 2013
Well my birthday-themed emotional outburst was pretty embarrassing. But at the very least it is good that I got it out of my system and am able to move past it.
Right now I have to steel myself against all the frustrations I've been feeling at work. I had lunch with my future department head when the company splits, and she said unfortunately since the other side is playing so dirty, there's not much we can do but grin and bear it until we're able to get up and out of there. I'm praying that's sooner rather than later: Currently the official split date is January 1st, but I'm seriously praying that they get everything done sooner so we don't have to wait until the end of the year.
The good news in all of this work drama, though, is that I was told point blank that when the split is final, the intent was to make me a supervisor and give me a sizable promotion. There aren't specific details yet and I understand that these are all just words right now, but it's really great to know that at least someone in upper management recognizes my hard work and intends to utilize my skills rather than squandering them.
As far as food has been going, the past few days have really shocked me. Cravings and temptations to eat/binge have been at zero. Yesterday was the third day in a row I came home from work and just didn't feel like I had to eat, so I didn't (well last night I had a bite from each of the remaining cupcakes, because they were going bad and I wanted to at least taste them. But they were just bites and surely didn't even add up to a whole cupcake's worth). Yesterday, even though I wasn't officially tracking, I estimate it was about 1200-1300 calories. There was a 340 calorie salad for lunch, a 85 calorie iced coffee, a 580-650 salad for dinner, and a few cupcake bites that couldn't be more than 250. That's about 1325 at most.
I think my sudden reduction in appetite has stemmed from all the tea I've been drinking. On a birthday whim I bought myself a tea carafe (like a travel mug but with a strainer/filter for tea or coffee to brew in it) and I've been drinking at least 2-3 servings of tea while at work. It's mostly black tea and kava root tea, but I usually have a can of green tea with honey and ginseng extract when I get home. Maybe that's what's doing it? Haha I'm really not going to question it; I'm just going to keep doing it and keep hoping my appetite doesn't overwhelm me!
Despite the appetite thing, though, I haven't really been losing weight. I have no idea how much I gained over last weekend due to birthday binging, but my weight-in today had me at 196.4. Technically that's a loss, but like .2 pounds. I'm not going to complain, considering it's still a loss and it's only been like two days since I was eating 1800 calories. Sometimes I've got to remind myself that time isn't passing as quickly as it feels. Hopefully this trend will continue and I will keep losing. I want to make up that eleven pounds I gained BAD. The sooner I do that, the sooner I can forget and move past my indiscretions.
In other news, I was seriously considering doing something to boost my weight loss in terms of supplements and cleanses. I'm skeptical, though, because my preliminary research is telling me the only "weight loss" supplement approved by the FDA is that Alli stuff that will cause "seeping grease leakage" if you're not careful. Gross! I'm seeing a bunch of aggressively positive ads for things like garcinia and colon cleanse combos and green tea extracts and whatnot, and I'm skeptical at best. But at the same time, I can't help but think what could hurt? If they're all natural extracts from plants and fruits rather than engineered chemical complexes, what's the worst that could happen besides no results or an allergic reaction or something?
Perhaps I should do more research. In any case I've gotten out of the habit of taking any supplements at all, and I need to fix that. I definitely need to start back on iron and multivitamin, and maybe I should through in some b-12 and fiber chewables while I'm at it, considering I know a lot of people who say those supplements really work. Do any of you take anything that you find particularly helpful?
Well here's hoping I can stick to a trend of making good decisions and see if the scale actually shows some results in the coming days and weeks. I've got to get ready for work now. I hope everyone is having a great hump day! It's all downhill from here, right? Haha.