In the beginning .....
Monday, September 16, 2013
So I was recently asked for more information on how I got started on my weight loss journey and as I began to respond to spark member I realized others my be interested as well. Typically when people ask me how I lost my weight I respond with either, having a baby did it or I stopped trying and excepted myself, and honestly both are true
After my son was born (4-1/2 yrs ago), I was at my heaviest and most unhappy. I had been heavy before and it hadn't really bothered me but now I didnt even feel like myself, my body had changed subtly and nothing fit right, my son was two months and I was still wearing my maternity pants cause I couldn't fit in anything else. I felt unattractive and useless. And then I realized, "so what?", and stopped fretting. I was fat, yes, but so what. I still had good shape and a good guy and a cute little baby that needed me regardless, so I stopped caring about my size and focused on my knew job as mommy. I realized I wasn't gonna magically loose weight magically and knew I was to lazy to excercise, and I thought eating correctly meant starvation, so I came to the conclusion that I couldn't and wouldn't change so there was no need stressing over it.
I lost alot of the baby weight fairly easily by nursing and restricting my caffeine intake and such, ( I was determine that nursing would work and was afraid of eating anything that might upset his little tummy.
And then something happened....
I was visiting a friend (a big girl too, 26/28), with a two year old boy and older girl, we were chatting, the normal mommy talk and then here son who was playing on the floor in front of us, started whining ( there was some issue with his toy) my friend leaned forward and could not reach the toy so she told the boy to pick it up and bring it to her, she fixed issue. Through out that visit I notice her daughter do things for her like chase her son down to change his diaper cause she couldn't catch him and saw how her son would bring toys onto the couch to get mom to play with him. When I left I cried all the way home, then I'd look at my son in the back seat and cry some more, i didn't want to be that kind of mother. I wanted to roll on the floor and play, i wanted to chase him, i wanted to have fun with him and keep him safe. It's funny looking back, cause in that moment I didn't even consider that I needed to loose weight, I just knew that I was gonna need stamina and energy to keep up with him. My son wasn't quit for months old and I made the decision to start walking around our neighborhood. I had always been to embarrassed before to walk/excercise where I could be seen. But this time I didn't think about it, I wasn't " exercising I was walking my baby. That first trip out I don't think I even made it two blocks! But soon I was going six, then ten blocks and I could feel how much easier it was to breath and I loved the freedom to think. Then one day I realized I was smaller, it was like a pleasant shock, I'd lost weight, "how'd that happen?" I was so excited then and I made a list of things I should do to continue this trend. Things like when baby woke fore morning feeding get up and go for a walk instead of going back to sleep, make multiple trips up/down stairs for laundry, eat more salads/no ice cream...etc... A good list with good ideas and I accomplished not a one!! I just couldn't get myself to do it!! But I kept with the walking and began going farther through the neighborhood adding hilly streets,meeting some nice people, occasionally getting support yelled at me from a front porch! I enjoyed my walks so much I would often add a second one by myself.
And then one day quite by accident I looked at the nutrition label on my crackers and was floored to see that I had just eaten nearly three servings as a snack! I didn't start counting calories or nutrition I honestly wasn't concerned with that, probably because I was ignorant to its importance, but I did begin portioning out my food, now many times I still ate more than one portion but before I knew it I wasn't needing more and that's when I started following that list I'd made months earlier, and began expanding my workout with the WII FIT, often holding my infant as I hula hooped, I made sure to get in my 30mins so I could get my coin!! By the time my child was 7mos I was down to a size 18 and very close to 220 lbs.
I think I'll leave off here for now. That's how I began my weightloss journey, it was not easy or magical although in some ways it feels that way now. I was walking miles a day, up large hills in high heat, and it wasn't easy, but in my mind it wasnt "excercise", no pushups, situps, sprinting, etc...just walking. Now the second leg of my journey definetly included a lot more sweat and pain!
A few yrs after my weight loss i experienced a lot of upheaval in my life that triggered some weight gain. But when i chose to dosomething about it, the weight came off and im back at my new normal, funnily the second time around my approach was way different and not in the least "accidental". Knowing what I know now I often wonder how I managed to change myself in the first place, and if I could have/would have done it hade I been armed with the knowledge of health and excercise I have now. Knowledge is power, but it often leads to excuses and fear.