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Let's refocus

Sunday, September 15, 2013

Let's refocus and try this again. There were things going on this week that I didn't or couldn't do. And I'm upset. Wednesday night was open house night at my daughter's high school. She reallg wanted me to go. Her school is at the top of a hill - like 60 steps to the school. I was just there Monday huffing and puffing so I really did not want to do it again. I didn't. She said she was okay with it, but I wish I didn't disappoint her.

Yesterday,there was a local 5k that I always look forward to. I knew I couldn't beat my time, I know I'm heavier than last year. I didn't go because I was embarrassed.

That afternoon I downloaded a c25k program on my phone. I did the very beginning walk/ run and couldn't even do all of the running...but I did do 3 of them. Not bad considering I didn't think I would be able to do any. I had a long and honest talk with myself and God before I started. I admitted that exercising scares me. What if it doesn't work? What if I'm doing it wrong? What if I get hurt? Losing weight scares me. What will I feel like? People will notice. I think I'm happy hiding behind my weight blob...but had ti admit that I don't like it when people look past me ti avoid looking at me.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DJ4HEALTH 9/15/2013 10:32PM

    Just remember this when you lose the weight you will feel better and forget what people say. (unless it is to say way to go) then just thank them and leave it at that. Plus you want to be able to do things with your children and to be there for them.

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