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So many changes...

Sunday, September 15, 2013

Let's see... where to begin. emoticon

In ...May, was it?...the state of New York determined that, because I failed twice to renew my auto insurance on time (for some reason, right after my husband died, "remember to insure the car" just wasn't on the top of my To Do list...and they eventually caught up with me for this grievous infraction), I would no longer be allowed to drive anything registered to me for 90 days. emoticon

I could legally drive anything from a unicycle to a tractor trailer, as long as it wasn't mine. They were tossing around words like "arraignment" and "felony", though, and naturally I got in yet more trouble when, after I pointed out that I hadn't even driven the !@#$ car at that time, they said, "Well, you could have." Any sane person would have kept silent, but I, of course, had to pipe right up and say, "Well, I *could* have robbed a bank, too, but I didn't do that either." This is, as my attorney advised me, not a way to engender sympathy on the court room, and he made me swear to say only the things he told me to say, and word for word. (Oh, I'd also pointed out that maybe their time would be better served chasing actual criminals than picking on penniless, forgetful widows...apparently another poor choice on my part.) emoticon emoticon

Somehow I escaped a massive fine, felony conviction, probation and general Not Good Person status, I think because my attorney played on the same soft-ball team as the judge. After all that bench warrant/felony/arraignment talk, all I got was a $50 fine and $35 court cost charge. Such is justice in our fair land. emoticon emoticon

The net result of this was that I did a lot of walking (lost no weight, though) and couldn't keep up with the landscaping job. I never was officially fired, but since the job ended, today!...anyway, I worked 40+ hours in four days' time for a special end-of-season shindig and left on good terms. I may be doing some other work for them soon - as a state funded facility, you never can count on much or find out ahead of time what the plans are anyway. emoticon

So, left to my own devices, with the nearest grocery a 20 mile round trip hike, I discovered that Amazon will deliver food - human and pet - to your door, so that's pretty much how I survived. I developed a taste for some pretty odd and exotic things and I now brew my own kombucha and both milk and water kefirs. Fresh fruits and veggies were in short supply, since I didn't plant my own garden this year, but I learned a lot about Euell Gibbons-type food. emoticon

You know how tv always tells you about skinny kids who go to prison, where they have nothing to do but exercise and do push-ups in their cells, and they come out all buff and gorgeous? Yeah, well, that didn't happen to me. Despite having all the time in the world to exercise and do healthy things, I still managed to gain an unknown amount of weight - I figure 10ish pounds. I still wear the same clothing, but now they're tight instead of loose. Not good. SO not good. emoticon emoticon

On the Good side, though, a dear friend who makes what I consider to be a boat load of money (a small boat, perhaps, to the Gainfully Employed among us) as an e-book writer, convinced me that I ought to sit down and write some of these !@#$ books I've been yammering about for years. So I'm doing just that. emoticon

Just in time for Halloween, we have:

(There's a Kindle version over on amazon)

And there are more on the way. I had to take a break of a couple days after my Amish neighbor's barn blew down in a tornado (!) the other day, but I'm writing full time otherwise. Now I eat even more and move even less, so I'm lugging my ever-expanding bum back to SP while there's still time. emoticon

Don't even bother to tell me to start today, because I won't. But I will start tomorrow. My new life consists of driving Amish kids to school emoticon (I'll tell you about that another time), eating right emoticon and juicing, emoticon exercising, emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon and writing. emoticon

So what all have I missed during my long absence? emoticon Tell! Tell! emoticon emoticon

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I'm going to check out your book. You are a wonderful writer. I've been off SP for the first time in many years. Took a break.
    1633 days ago
    I love wild food. Red Sumac tea is excellent. We don't have red sumac down here in Florida. (The color is like your page.) I've been eating wild purslane. It's not bad, very healthy. They have wild edible foraging meet ups down here. I haven't gone to one yet. Keep foraging. But be careful during hunting season.

    Sorry about your trouble with the law. No fun. I'm glad that you are back to driving. Good luck on your writing. emoticon
    1642 days ago
    Oh Lordy! Together we would get thrown into jail. The same words would have come out of my mouth in such a situation.
    Also I would have driven my car any way and just *hope* that I wouldn't get caught because what they did is take away your right to make a living by taking away your right to drive your own car, which really makes NO SENSE AT ALL. You could have driven anything as long as it wasn't registered to YOU? That is just plain idiotic. But I'm sure you already figured that out.

    Amazon sounds like it really worked for you in this situation which is pretty cool! And which parts of the pine tree is edible?

    I'm happy to hear you are writing! That is simply awesome! I hope you make a bundle, baby! You deserve it.

    What have you missed? Well, I have it all blogged and ready for you to read. Just head on over to my page, darlin'!

    Missed you! Glad you're back!
    1642 days ago
    90 days, yikes! So when are the 90 days up and will the insurance company still insure you?
    1644 days ago
    It's so good to see you on a writing roll! I just checked out your book, and I'm ordering a copy, it sounds so good. You are now officially The Most Interesting Woman in the World. Dos Equis, anyone?


    I think you've got another book in you about driving Amish kids to school! Hold on. It's OKAY for them to ride in an English car but not have their parents drive one? Guess it isn't like not going anywhere on the sabbath.

    I just heard a horrific tale of a runaway Amish horse in Lancaster County who ended up going through the passenger-side windshield and down the whole length of a minivan, leaving itself dead and the passenger in critical condition. Don't you get near any of them horses!

    Let me know how you do that ebook writing, will ya? If I live long enough after retiring, I want to do that too.
    1644 days ago

    Comment edited on: 9/16/2013 6:17:24 PM
    It sounds like you have been very busy trying to keep out of the local version of Alcatraz. LOL. !! I expect to see you on the Amish Mafia show now. LOL. It's one of my favorites. LOL.
    1644 days ago
    I was actually going into a 'miss Scooter's blogs' tremors...should have known you were still writing...just now for pay! SMART girl!

    I laughed all the way through your court was SO a page out of my book when I got pulled over for an illegal right hand turn in Ft. Lauderdale calmly following the 50 OTHER cars that made the same turn right in front of me! emoticon LUCKY ME...I'm the one that gets pulled over by this minature cop with an attitude all big LOOK AT ME...I'm the FACE of authority and little cockroach were making an ILLEGAL turn.

    This was at the time that I worked for a bank and you had to wear these ridiculous uniforms that labeled you a banker...not a term I take to lightly now that we've been fighting the valiant 'save our home' fight for years and I now consider bankers right up there with great mafia families....

    but I digress. I calmly look over at the officer leering into my window...trying to look down my zippered front uniform peeping under my demure scarf to see if he could spot a little cleavage...and said..."Well I'm VERY sorry officer...I was just following the line of traffic..I won't do this again...but it is pretty hard to navigate this road construction during rush hour.

    All true facts and something that would have made perfect sense to someone other than a 5'4: pee~wee cop with power issues! emoticon

    "WELL...he rears back and stretches his spine to the max...might have added another 1/4" or so to his height, THEY didn't get caught MISSY...YOU DID!"

    Okay...those are fighting words...I'm saying stuff like "'d think you had BETTER things to do like hunt down murderers or rapists...FT. Lauderdale is full of was an innocent mistake...and I'm following 100 cars that did the VERY same thing..obviously it isn't properly marked for this turn now is it?"

    He calls for back up! emoticon "Give me your license and your registration he bellows...I'm like fine! Then I think of something to rouse him good.

    " husband the LAWYER is going to love this!"

    How that popped out of my mouth I'll NEVER know...DH is NO lawyer and shrinks from ANY conflict...why did I bring HIM into this.

    What's in that bag he snorts looking at my purse laying innocently on the seat besides me. "Oh BESIDES my mean?"

    Yep...just had to let that one go too...I'm just getting in deeper and deeper here.

    The second squad car pulls up behind...flashers blazing for the world to see.

    Shorty writes me a ticket. I refuse to sign...on principle here. He's being an ass and I feel that if I sign I'm admitting wrong...I was JUST following all the other idiots that did the SAME exact thing I did...they just weren't lucky enough to meet up with half pint who has anger issues.

    "IF you DON'T sign this'll be handcuffed and hauled off to jail!"

    "Fine, officer....I'll just follow you down there and we'll get this whole thing ironed out! By the way...what's your BADGE # and NAME...because you can BET I'm reporting you!" This is NO WAY to treat a fine upstanding citizen...who was JUST following the line of traffic in the FIRST place!"

    Okay I get hauled off to jail and my car gets impounded. I am pretty well panicked by now..."I GET my ONE phone call!" I shreik as they haul me into the station.

    After all I've watched some television here!

    This is turning into a blog in and of itself...but long story short. I had to have DH come and bail me out. Went before the judge and the little shrimp didn't show up..those short guys are big bullys..or maybe someone knocked his block off at another traffic stop. hindsight...principals set aside...I should have just signed the stinkin' ticket and called it a day. emoticon

    It is SO just can't fight city hall. AND MAN... I SOOOO HATE that! emoticon Now I've got to go check out your book...good fun! emoticon
    1644 days ago

    Comment edited on: 9/16/2013 4:21:21 PM
    It's good to see you blogging again.
    I laughed out loud when you described what you said - or wanted to say. I would have been feeling the same way!

    Anyway - how delightful that you have published a book.
    I have bought two of them. One is for me - and the other I will give as a gift to a friend of mine who is a writer too.

    I look forward to reading about all those supernatural beings - and perhaps to more blogs here too.

    > emoticon
    1644 days ago
    What an awesome blog! OK, sure, I'm sorry for all that you went through, but I'm looking on the bright side here. Had you not gone through all that you had to suffer at the hands of idiots, where I would be right now? Huh? One thing for sure, I wouldn't be sitting here typing this comment after having read one of the most entertaining blogs I've ever seen on SP.
    So, you suffered a little. It's No Thing. But, for those who matter most (you know, people like me who hunger for entertaining blogs) it was so well worth it.
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1644 days ago
    IT so friggin awesome to hear wonderful things happening for you .. One day at a time.. will be reading your books for sure.. I love to read and can't wait..

    things here are crazy but good .. We are moving to Minnesota. We found a house there and put a offer on .. will be moving around the first of November.. Hope the snow holds off.. just right now we received a offer on our home.. so now to work out the details.... I am excited at all the changes coming.. and looking forward to eating cleaning and moving while it happens..
    1644 days ago
    Thank goodness for lawyers and judges who play softball together!!!!! (I hear prison food is pretty high carb)
    1644 days ago
    1645 days ago
    WElcome back... my, my, but you've had an exciting summer... I've been walking, and walking and walking, and guess what, I might have muscles, but the scale isn't on my side either, I am staying within a 4 lb range..... .

    And when I say walking, I really mean it, I'm already at a 1000 fitness min award for this month... today did about 10 km, and have even done as much as 13 km in a day, that is really walking, why no weight loss is a mystery.... seems like it might be too many carbs,

    gotta check out that book idea.... how's it going?
    1645 days ago
    Dang, I've missed you! Tell me more! Please!
    1645 days ago
    SCOOTER you are back, Maybe you will do as well as JK if you have the reiki and the ghost busting.
    I have New eyes. Cataracts were done one before our 50th anniversary and one last Thursday. I have had lazy eye from birth and I feel I am seeing the world a fresh I blog everything. Our Ca son is now in Wisconsin working for Sargento in a couple of weeks. I wanted to drive up with him from Ca to Wi but my surgery had to come first.

    I am so glad you are back. I thought Amish kids did not ride in cars. What do I know I am from Britain. HUGS Pat I am so happy you are back. emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1645 days ago

    Comment edited on: 9/15/2013 8:21:31 PM
    I got a bang out of your story about a near-felony conviction. You sound like you said exactly the kinds of things I'd (like) to have said when I went to court over a neighbors issue with his dogs. But, the judge was a friend with the neighbor (the judge should have recused himself but didn't), and so the judge told me that I wasn't allowed to speak at all, and if I did he would send the sheriff to my house to take MY (inside only dogs) and have them put down. WTH!? As if (my) dogs had anything to do with this mess! I really wanted to tell that judge that if he did that I would sue him, and I wanted to quote some law to him. But none of that would matter at all if my dogs were dead. Cause to me, if he killed my dogs he may as well have killed me.

    And, the neighbor got away with saying the most horrible things in court, like, "If I want your dogs dead I will make sure I kill them", and "If you were laying in your front yard having a heart attack I wouldn't call 911". Yep, he got away with saying all that, and his friend the (corrupt) judge let that kind of talk go on for half an hour, and I didn't dare say a word or it would cost my dogs their life. But, let me tell you, I would have liked to said some really CLEAR stuff to that judge - on the level you spoke about. But, with this judge ( I ) would have been sitting in jail pronto for insubordination to the court.

    There just ain't NO justice!
    1645 days ago
    Great blog :)
    Can't wait to hear about driving the amish kids!
    1645 days ago
  • CDCSMITH2013
    Gosh I feel like I have a million things to say and I'm baking cookies (verdict is still out on that - weirdest "dough" I've ever worked with). Anyway, I'm glad to see you back and being close to the edge of sanity with government agencies myself, I totally understand needing to say things even if it isn't the right thing to do to stay out of trouble. Glad you ended up okay. Looking forward to reading you stuff. Welcome back.
    1645 days ago
    OMG!! I feel like such a boring, loser!!! I've never been threatened with being charged with a felony and I don't think I have the spunk to speak up in a courtroom. Now I see you're a ghost/spirit specialist (my son would love you!!!)AND you're a Reiki Master. Geez! All I can say is I'm a retired teacher. *YAWN*
    My quick update: our last beagle died the Monday before my son's wedding (stroke?); my son got married; we spent a week at the lake with the entire family (first time) and had a great time. Granddaughter started Kdg. (she's not a big fan); grandson started preschool (it's ok) and we just adopted another beagle (Buster).
    Sounds like the Amish neighbors are working out. I would love to hear the story of driving the kids to school!!!!
    Get back on track when you're ready!!!!
    So glad to hear from you! I missed you!!!!
    1645 days ago
  • JANEDOE12345
    Do the Amish know your near-felon status!?
    Here's what you missed: My SO became my Best Friend, I gained 10 more pounds, I got back to serious SP'ing on 9/1 and have lost 5.6 of those pounds since. Also, I have created a diplomatic peace with Dear Daughter and am happy at work. Everyone else has tales to tell and I will let them tell them. Gotta go check out that link you supplied.

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon


    1645 days ago
    Holy crap I've missed you!!!! and now I find out you're a ghost hunter, reiki master (or mistress)???? WTH?? I have no doubt you will be extremely successful at your writing.. cuz I looooooove reading your blogs.. AND OUR JUDICIAL SYSTEM SUCKS!!!

    So glad you're back!
    1645 days ago
    great blog ... still has me smiling ear to ear
    1645 days ago
    Dying to hear about driving the Amish kids! Great blog!
    1645 days ago
    Great blog! Keep on track!
    1645 days ago
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