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    JAYDEE1211   30,040
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Weight being public property


Saturday, September 14, 2013

I had to do a number of presentations at work this week so I dressed a tiny bit differently. I wore a top I was keeping for my birthday. The new top was a more tailored fit than the clothes I usually wear. All of a sudden, many people started commenting on my weight.

I must admit that I am proud of myself but I know I still have a very long way to go. So... I didn't mind people noticing.

What I didn't like was when I started getting comments about what I was eating. Lollies were offered around but I was overlooked as "you don't need these". I probably wouldn't have taken a sweet but still! I suppose people want to be supportive but I am trying to get a handle on moderation NOT dieting.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
SYLPHINPROGRESS 9/23/2013 4:06PM

    Why "admit" that you're proud of yourself? Sing it from the rooftops. As to the co-workers and anyone else who pops up in the role of fairy godparent, you can let them know -- with your brightest smile and happiest laugh -- that the solicitousness is unnecessary: "I got this far on my own, so I must know what I'm doing." Anyone whose intentions are truly honorable will hear the unspoken "That's insulting." The others can stew in their own juices. They'll all show their true colors soon enough.

The only thing that matters is how well you're caring for yourself and how you feel about it.

Comment edited on: 9/23/2013 4:07:05 PM

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BOSS61 9/23/2013 7:46AM

    First things first, thanks for your blog comment.

Secondly, perhaps few people have blogged more hereabouts than the exact circumstance you describe - people being judgmental of others because of their weight. Many of us, even we 4% of Sparkies who happen to be male, face this and have faced it in the past. It's got to be much worse for women (Thank you Hollywood, TV, fashion industry...)

Possessing the curse of a photographic memory and being probably considerably older than yourself, I shave perfect recall of every weight-related put-down, shun or action/intonation of disrespect hurled my way for nearly half a century. Even the people who commented so cheerfully when I had dropped a bunch of pounds got me wondering why it took something so superficial to generate something positive.

Maybe I'm along but I bet I'm not: I hate people who make judgments about people based on their weight. I always have, and I always will, regardless of how much or little I happen to weigh.

Thanks for reminding me of the worthiness of this blog topic! (And trust me, you are among friends here).

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ANGGEL40 9/14/2013 7:44PM

    I don't think they mean any harm..just wanted to try and help I suppose..you are doing great so don't let small comments get to you..I bet you looked emoticon in your new top! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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BEBOP4ME 9/14/2013 5:40PM

    I hear you, but I get annoyed when I am eating healthy and am constantly being offered treats. I know where they are. If I want them, I will get them! I think they are trying to be well meaning both ways.

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LIVINGFREE19 9/14/2013 12:40PM

    That is sad to be excluded, but understanding the general populations idea of weight loss, they were probably thinking they were helping you, rather than offending you. This is just another perspective, although it doesn't make it right!

emoticon

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FIFIFRIZZLE 9/14/2013 10:57AM

    I agree, it is hard for people to be encouraging in the right way.

I do value my Sparkfriends cheering me on but I generally don't involve my colleagues in my support or accountability crew. That said several people are consistently encouraging me now, I take it as it is meant.
My DH is my best support and he knows just to leave me to do my thing but tell me how good I am looking, I trust him to say the right thing.

I'd be annoyed exactly like you if someone started involving themselves in what I actually eat, sheesh.

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RASPBERRY56 9/14/2013 8:56AM

    Times like these make me wish people would just shut the $#!@ up! You know what that saying is - "if you can't say something nice, say NOTHING"! That also goes for comments that on the surface sound nice, but really imply something else, like the speaker's character (or LACK OF)!

Keep up the good work!

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DALMOM2007 9/14/2013 8:05AM

    emoticon Sometimes I feel sorry for the people around us...they're damned if they offer us something to eat...we think that they are sabotaging us, and they're damned if they don't..we think they are policing us. They just can't win. emoticon

I'm happy that at my work, they are very supportive and even yesterday, one of my co-workers joined SparkPeople.

emoticon on the weight loss. emoticon

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RDEE22 9/14/2013 7:38AM

    It is lovely when other people start to notice. I agree with you, you should make the choice about whether to eat or not. I hate it when people assume to know what's best for me. emoticon

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RIDLEYRIDER 9/14/2013 7:21AM

  It is nice to have others notice our efforts, isn't it? Congrats, and keep up the good work!

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WENDYJM4 9/14/2013 6:44AM

    emoticon this is awesome and makes it all worthwhile when people start to notice. emoticon

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STEPH-KNEE 9/14/2013 4:28AM

    First off congrats on the weight loss! I am sure you are looking amazing and people can't help but notice, but you definitely don't need food police or anyone worrying about messing up your diet, because as you are said you are not on a diet! I have a girl at work that will say "ladies do you want cookies.. well Stephanie I'm offering, but I'm not offering, you know what I mean!" And it gets so annoying. She is worried she is going to tempt me and if I take it it's like she's "sabotaging me" so I eventually got to the point where I'd say "Oh don't worry, I can eat whatever I want it's not a big deal, but I'm not hungry right now" and would move on. I wouldn't take the treat mainly because she bugged me LOL, but I had to get it in there that I could have one if I wanted to make that choice.

Oh well, some people don't get it, but you get it and that is why you have lost so much weight! emoticon

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