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    CHARTHESTAR   71,983
SparkPoints
60,000-79,999 SparkPoints
 
 
a redo that I wish wasn't

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

I didn't end up doing much of anything today. Took my cat to the vet, slept and watched a video. And ate things I know I should not have. I don't think I went over my calories for the day but nothing I ate today was healthy for me except for my medicines and my multiple vitamin.
I did a sad depressed day and really wasn't that sad or depressed. why do I do that to myself?
I have so much to do and want to do. Let alone what needs to be done and I sleep instead of making myself happy by accomplishing something with my stuff or spending time with people I love.
This is nothing new. Now I am crying.

I redid this day- like I have done so many others. Not sure why I let myself do this to me. I know I am better than that. Than this.
I mess up my schedule. I get mad at myself for not doing anything constructive. And don't feel good the next day because of the food I ate.

I KNOW the only way I am going to get better is to eat right, sleep and exercise properly and loose some weight.
I know that loosing weight won't make me happy. I KNOW THIS.
Even read something today about that on spark people. Most of the time I like me, I am happy and wouldn't want to be anyone else. I don't ever want to be anyone else. I just want to be a better me. the best me I can be. I know it is way more than I am doing now.

Loosing weight will make me a healthier person. And lets face it. NOTHING is more important than being healthy. You can't help the people you love if you are not as healthy and as positive as you can be.

9/11 has been a date that changed a lot for people all over the world.Maybe I can make this day the day for change for me. I don't like doing what I do on days like today. I am the only one that can change that.
I have better at not picking sleep over friends and family. Now I need to not pick sleep over making me happy every day.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BOSS61 10/24/2013 7:32PM

    You might want to consider losing an "o" in "Loosing" weight!!! (*** ducks while she swings and hits me!).

Seriously, you are doing great - we all see it!

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LE7_1234 9/16/2013 12:49AM

    "I have so much to do and want to do. Let alone what needs to be done and I sleep instead of making myself happy by accomplishing something with my stuff or spending time with people I love. "

I find that the days I have so much to do are sometimes the hardest ones to just start doing--because I get so overwhelmed and don't know what to do first.

When I realize what's going on, I can snap out of it by picking one thing, *anything*, to just *do*. Once I finish one thing, it's easier to pick the next. And yes, it is great to put "spending time with people I love" high on the list, even if that means something else doesn't get done. :-)

Hope you're feeling better today.

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NANCYPAT1 9/12/2013 6:10AM

    You can forgive yourself and move on to a new day

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GARDENCHRIS 9/11/2013 11:27PM

    be kinder to yourself! Could you even have thought of writing a blog about your day like this 6 months ago..... probably not..... the very first step to change anything is to realize there is a problem ..... so you did now do something with this knowledge!

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BUSYGRANNY5 9/11/2013 10:20PM

    I agree.... this too shall pass and you will get back on track....

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TULIPVIC 9/11/2013 10:09PM

    Oh Char, don`t be so hard on yourself! Everybody has days like this, it`s normal. So tomorrow you pick yourself right back up and get going again! Maybe a down day was just what you needed to make you realize what you need to do. And maybe you needed the rest. So forget today and concentrate on tomorrow, okay!
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