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When life gets hard, I eat. But I should exercise.

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Life has been hard. I know it doesn't compare to the challenges that someone else may be facing, especially on this historic day, but for me, it's been hard. There has been less time to plan ahead for food, more travel for family events, increased pain in my back and more stress at work.

For the past two days I have been binging on applesauce again. What I really want are peanut m&m's but I went for applesauce instead. Now, applesauce is allowed on my diet, but not in the portions that I am eating it. And then the next day I feel bad for a variety of reasons. I feel guilty for giving in to my binges again, I feel bad cuz the applesauce hurts my stomach and I feel ashamed because I'm using food to deal with feeling depressed. Today I finally realized what was bringing on this depression.

I've been working with someone in my job and he is really not a fan of mine. It makes work difficult to enjoy, drains me of my energy and is starting to affect my healthy lifestyle changes. I'd rather go home than to the gym after work. I'd like to just keep eating instead of anything else. It's a terrible way to be living my life, clearly.

I have to really focus on my health at this point. I can't allow stress to de-rail me. I allowed stress from a colleague to hurt me physically and mentally for three years in my last job. No more. I've just been successful at losing the weight I put on my body during those years, and I'm not going back. So what does that mean? I have to stand up for myself at work. Make myself a priority at work and at home. I will use exercise to help me handle my stress, and will work every day to not binge eat like I have been finding myself doing recently and in the past.

Sounds like I have a plan, now I just have to put it into action. Wish me luck!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • LIZ324_NYC
    emoticon Don't let someone else's actions define yours. Remember misery loves company! Good luck and stay strong!
    1650 days ago

    Comment edited on: 9/12/2013 11:31:28 AM
    Put yourself first! Good for you!!
    1650 days ago
  • BRADMILL2922
    Good luck! Stress can be really hard and really can effect many aspects of life. I hope you can get that under control soon so you can execute your plan to the fullest!
    1650 days ago
    I think that's it we simply have to be determined. Standing up for yourself will help on so many levels. I know how hard that is as I have been bullied by a lot of people in my life. You can do it! emoticon emoticon
    1650 days ago
  • DALID414
    Good luck emoticon
    1650 days ago
    I can really relate! I eat out of emotion all the time, and I gotta tell you, I don't have an easy answer. It is something I still struggle with. Keep at it, though. Every time you feel the urge to eat when you're not hungry, try to find something else to keep you busy. I find that something that involves my hands is very helpful. Best of luck to you!
    1650 days ago
    I admire you very much for your determination to not let an unpleasant colleague rob you of all your hard work and success! Good luck and well wishes in every aspect of your life! I'm cheering you on!!!

    Miller emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1650 days ago
    You can do it...I have faith in you.
    1650 days ago
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