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    DTYUNGU   11,565
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My Sister Hates Me

Wednesday, September 04, 2013


This is my sister and I last summer enjoying a day at a nearby amusement park. We are smiling into my phone from the top of a ferris wheel. I remember having mixed feelings that day. I took us to this place partially expecting that the childhood memories that we created there would resurface and we might be able to rekindle the happy feelings created in childhood. I was wrong of course. I felt that the entire day was filled with fake smiles underhanded comments.

When did she start to hate me? I wish I knew. She was distant in high school and acted as though she missed me when I would come home from college but in all honesty I am not sure she ever did. She says she loves me, well she used to say she loves me, I haven't heard that in what seems like forever.

It seems like the more weight I lose, the more I succeed, the more I try to help her = the more she hates me. Is hate too strong of a word? Maybe... but she treats me worse than any enemy I've ever had. The truth is that my sister does not take care of herself and she may not love herself so how can I expect her to love me?

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I recently helped her fund a new car. I recently loaned her cash for new clothes. Within 25 minutes of both of these gestures she somehow managed to blurt out that she hated me. 'I hate you' hearing those words from her cut me like a knife across my abdomen and those words said because she did not like something mundane inside my car.

We live together currently and she has 3 dogs. Her dogs are not trained and she refuses to allow me to crate them so that they will learn not to make a mess in the house. emoticon I have tried so hard to help to discuss the situation with her nicely but she just does not care about what I have to say. I am so close to throwing my hands up and leaving the situation as soon as possible. I know that running away is not the right thing to do. It wont solve anything, it wont help her and it wont help me. But at least when I am far from her I don't feel her hatred fumes spewing in under my bedroom door.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HAMMA27 10/15/2013 1:53AM

  of course she doesn't hate you !!! She might be just jealous , that's human nature ! she does love you , but maybe feels bad about her self , you should try to help her out , maybe go in a little 1-1 vacation . We do things for our blood ! thats why we re called one family!

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7WORSHIPS 9/8/2013 8:58AM

  emoticon to read about your living situation. This is not living. Consider getting a new roommate.

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RITAROSE 9/8/2013 7:48AM

  This is no way to live, find a new situation without your sister. Then you can try to work out why she hates you. I think what other have said about her being jealous is right on. Please don't enable her by giving her more money. Praying for you to have the strength to do what has to be done. It won't be easy, but it's the start of recovering from a very trying situation. emoticon

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RED_DEVIL_APRIL 9/5/2013 3:00AM

    Living with someone who is hateful can be difficult. If she won't make your living environment liveable then you need to leave. Only she can help herself and your only enabling her by allowing it to go on. For your own health & sanity get away. Maybe.then she will see a need & desire to change herself.

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THOMS1 9/4/2013 5:29PM

    Time to change roommates sister or not. Your sister will do fine on her own and may even learn to appreciate you. She needs to find her own way. emoticon

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TRENTDREAMER 9/4/2013 3:58PM

    emoticon

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NOCALORIES 9/4/2013 3:40PM

    Love yourself! You are a wonderful person acknowledge it. Keep blogging and letting the true you shine. Live today with joy in your heart because your Spark friends love you.

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GODDREAMDIVA1 9/4/2013 3:28PM

    emoticon

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LOFLLAMA 9/4/2013 3:24PM

    Just because someone is family does not give them the right to abuse you. Pack your things, tell her you love her & say goodbye. I have 2 mean hateful sisters who do NOT accept me for who I am. That's okay! I have MANY people in my life (INCLUDING ME) who love me exactly as I am. You are great & you deserve to be treated as such!
I LOVE YOU!
Lisa

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PICKIE98 9/4/2013 3:19PM

    the truth? Your sister is so jealous of you, she could spit! I do not know if she is older or younger than you are, BUT she is spoiled and jealous. You have $$, a job, looks, beautiful hair, teeth, etc. You are changing by losing weight.
You need to set boundaries with this person, stop enabling her to treat you like dirt. Would you allow me to treat you that way?
She is emotionally, verbally abusive.
Now, fast forward, replace the word her with HE and that may be your husband/ boyfriend that you allow to treat you this way.
telling you she hates you is designed to keep you down, and keep her in control, a bully...
You have allowed her to step on you, abuse you, you need to stand up for yourself and say NO to some things. like her mouth and those poor dogs that have no discipline either.

Maybe if you DID look for another place, she might start thinking.. Stand your ground and never stop going for your goals...

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RED_DEVIL_APRIL 9/4/2013 3:02PM

    Living with someone who is hateful can be difficult. If she won't make your living environment liveable then you need to leave. Only she can help herself and your only enabling her by allowing it to go on. For your own health & sanity get away. Maybe.then she will see a need & desire to change herself.

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