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    FAIRERHIANNON   31,178
30,000-39,999 SparkPoints

Fighting insecurities

Tuesday, September 03, 2013

Oh, the sock puppets (insecurities/inner demons) have been LOUD lately.

A month or so ago, my sweetie had gastric bypass surgery. With his many health issues, his doctor felt this was his best option.

When he had the surgery, I was focused his well-being. Watching him struggle through not being able to eat, and the changes in what he CAN eat was really hard.

He's done really well, and the weight is coming off bit by bit.

But as his weight dropped closer to mine, all my little sock puppets started yelling.

They've bombarded me with all those negative messages I grew up hearing about my body, how my weight wasn't acceptable, how no one would want me if I weighed more than XXX.

And it's all coming from within ME.

Most of the time, I could care less about the number on the scale.

I'm here on SparkPeople to focus on eating better and moving more to be HEALTHIER. If that means the numbers on the scale move downward, fine, but I'm more focused on clothes fitting better and climbing hills while having a conversation.

Most of the time...

But sometimes, the sock puppets get me.

I know I'll be fine. I just need to re-build my supply of cope.

Until then... Somebody hand me a bat so I can beat these suckers back...

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
KEARTINE 11/4/2013 12:06AM

    So happy for him, for making a big movement towards being healthier, and so happy for YOU for working towards feeling good and being the best version of yourself. You cannot compete with anyone but yourself.

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