Well, it has been an unbelievably busy week! It was the kids 1st week of school, and so far, so good! College kids are settled in to their classes, Itty Bitty has adjusted well to being without her BFF, and I have survived the first week with all the kids back at my Middle School! I have made and distributed over 800 Student id's, moved and distributed over 2000 textbooks, and trained over 20 office aides! I am exhausted!!!
On top of that, I kept up with my diet and exercise program. I am up to 3 sets of 12 minute runs with a 1 minute walk between each set. I have never done this in my entire life! Ever! I am still really slow, but I am doing it! I am also in my last week of my kettlebell training and it is going well, too.
Yesterday, however, I realized that my body was telling me that I needed to take a break from the strict training program that I have been on for a few days, so I will not be doing my regular workout this weekend. I am just plain worn out! Like, beyond exhausted! My muscles were aching so much this week that I wasn't even able to get comfortable enough to sleep well. My back is sore from distributing all those books and my legs are aching from all of the running that they are not used to. I think I just need a few days off to rest up and give my muscles a chance to repair themselves. I will start back on my regular program and repeat this week's training on Monday if I am feeling better by then.
As far as my weight loss goes, I am really feeling discouraged. I looked back and found out that I weighed the exact same thing today that I did 2 months ago...181.5. That is the longest plateau that I have been on since I started. I have been bobbing back and forth between 178 and 184 for 2 months now, losing and gaining the same weight over and over again! I stay on track for 5 or 6 days and lose a few pounds, only to go off track and gain it all back in one day! It is so frustrating! I told Gailann this morning that I am just worn out. I am tired of fighting and tired of struggling. I am tired of this journey being so hard. I just want to be able to relax and not worry about food or exercise for a change.
I know what I would tell y'all if you were saying these things. "Keep pushing. You've come too far to give up now. This feeling will pass. You're not doing this for the scale, you are doing it for your health." etc. etc. etc.....
It's easy to stay on track when things are going well and you're losing. The tough part is when you stall for weeks (or months) at a time. Sometimes you just have to keep pushing through.
So, that's what I'll do. I'll keep trying and keep pushing and keep doing the best that I can, knowing that it's not going to be easy, and I'm not going to perfect. I have to, because I never want to go back to where I was 65 pounds ago! Surely, I can't stay stuck forever, can I??? Well, even if I do, 181 is so much better for me than 245 was.
If you're still reading this, thank you for sticking with me through my whine-fest! Maybe talking about it will help me push past this low place that I have found myself in! I really missed y'all this week and hope that I can catch up with everyone's blogs over the weekend! Maybe that will help me find my spark again
Now, I am going to go light some candles and take a nice, long, luxurious bubble bath. Then, I am going to go snuggle up in my bed and find one of my favorite old movies to watch. This weekend is going to be about relaxing and renewing my spirit. DH is taking the family to a football game in College Station tomorrow (yep, he's an Aggie!), so I am going to have the whole house to myself! Can't remember the last time I was by myself in my own house!
I feel better already, just talking this through with all of you! Thank you for being such faithful friends and supporting me through all my ups and downs! I know I will get through this one as well, because I have my secret weapon...YOU!!!
Oops, almost forgot....here is IB's back to school picture!