This was posted in my ETF group this afternoon and I have been thinking of my response...
Bob Harper's "Skinny Rules"
I am proud not to be a non conformist when it comes to the norm when it with fitness and diet. I made my own rule list in response to the "Skinny Rules"
1. Drink water when thirsty. Drink water with my Apple Cider Vinegar and Natural Calm. Not before a meal to squash my appetite. I work hard for my appetite, why wouldn't I want to enjoy the food?
2. I will drink my calories if I want to. I will also eat them.
3. I will eat protein at each meal. Along with CARBS and FAT.
4. I will slash my intake of flours and grains when I am not eating inbetween meals.
5. I will eat 30-50 g of fiber a day, or not.
6. I will eat apples and berries every day... or I may not...
7. No carbs when I sleep.
8. I will watch what I eat... as it goes into my mouth.
9. I will stop guessing about portion size, refer back to #8 and go back for seconds if I am still hungry or push my plate away if I am full.
10. I will add sugar when I want it. Sugar is tasty.
11. Mmmmmm potatoes. White, red, yellow, purple.....
12. Life is too short to go meatless or anything "less"
13. I will get rid of any food rules that tell me to do things.
14. What is a *real* breakfast?
15. I will eat at home whenever I want to eat at home.
16. I will banish no food.
17. I will eat my vegetables. And chocolate.
18. I will never "go hungry"
19. I will sleep laying down.
20. I will plan on living my life healthy, bound by no more food rules.
Okay so maybe a tad bit sarcastic and caustic, I suppose. What is the point of this? To some who read it may seem like I am eating grain laden white potato salt dumped on mounds of sugar meals while downing buckets of fast food and not sleeping. This is not the case. Fact of the matter is this: I am healing. I am healing from spending my entire adult life surrounded by food rules. Eat this, not that. Eat only clean. Don't eat after XX:XX. Exercise to burn off those calories from lunch. I am so beyond this now it feels amazing. I am learning, healing and slowly working to rebuild my life. Not being bound by ANYthing. Life is too short not to occasionally drink some calories or enjoy a white potato or consume my time by constantly label reading and making myself crazy. I have been there. I have done that. All of it. I am a mess because of it. I am a bundle of insecurity that has been so bound by rules and living a life that has been lead by label reading and eating and exercise. I am finding that I CAN live a life that is fueled by foods that I fix for my family in my kitchen with fresh veggies straight from the farmer's market, but with the knowledge that if I decide to consume calories in a cup, it is not going to be the end of the world.
Our society and gurus dictate to us what is "right" and "wrong". I have spent more time and energy than I care to recount figuring out the rules. To hell with the rules. Now don't get me wrong, I do understand that some have to abide by certain dietary rules based off of allergies or medical reasons, I am in the fortunate category to where I don't.
I am to the point that I can simply learn to enjoy life more.
I am in a process of healing. Healing myself from the inside. I spend a great amount of time hating myself. I will admit this fully. I feel disgusst a lot of the time, sad a lot of the time. I feel like there are times I am defined by and ruled by my outward appearance. I feel like a failure because I am still at a certain size 2 years post baby. I feel like I am worthless at times because I can't seem to be in a certain size. It is unnatural and a very unhappy way to live life. Don't get me wrong, I am not this way 100% of the time, but there are many times in my week that it eats at me and the negative talk replaces the good feelings I have been working hard to achieve. But it is there nonetheless. I am not recovering from an ED, I am not suffering metabolic damage due to low cal eating, but I am suffering a broken self image that I desperately want to work to repair. I want to be able to talk to my own self the way I do my children.
I am learning a lot from the ETF group. I am learning that it is possible to live a happy life, to be completely full of awesomeness without being a certain size. I can be happy eating enough food that allows me to achieve amazing strength gains (which I have seen over the last few months), to fuel my life in the PROPER way. I can be proud of being strong and of my curves and not seek out unhealthy means to obtain a fit and healthy body.
I have damaged myself over the years. I hate it. I hate being sad when I look in the mirror. I have been told that I suffer from dysmorphia and that I should be proud of where I am at. I have been constantly reminded that I am actually a very strong person who has suffered years of internal abuse by being told from the outside world that my appearance is everything. Life begins at size 8. It is BS through and through. Total and complete BS. Life begins here and now because I am so tired of it all. I want to be happy and confident. I want to radiate a personality that reflects an inner happiness that can only come from ME.
Again as my mantra goes, it isn't about "strong is the new skinny" it is about "healthy is the new skinny" (thanks to Go Kaleo for that little gem). I can and will get there. It is an uphill battle all the way. I know this and I will work to get there. The way I see it is Bob Harper can take his "skinny rules" and shove them! No more skinny rules here. Happiness rules. Eat for health. Eat the food, lift the weights, enjoy the life. Eff the rules. Life is all about balance, not being bound by constant rules.