breaks and broken people,,,,they heal.
Friday, August 23, 2013
Coming around the last curve of the walking track headed to my car tonight, I heard a voice say "You better speed it up a little". I turned to see my friend Scotty, on his bike.
I explained I was finishing up my final lap after an hour.
We exchanged the normal pleasantries, the weather, etc.
And I got into my car to drive away.
I sat there taking off my pedometer and getting ready to leave and I started thinking about how things have sure been different for myself and for Scotty this past year.
A year ago I was well on my way to losing weight for the first time in my many years of trying.
I had only lost like 35 pounds, but I knew this time was different.
I knew this time it meant life or death. I had chosen twice not to have weight loss surgery and I knew this was it.
I pushed myself hard from May til January and my self esteem was at an all time high a year ago.
I felt better about myself, I wasnt ashamed to go out with friends. I knew people were notIcing my weight loss and were really congratulating me.
Then in January, of course, things changed, I broke my foot and couldnt walk, which was my choice of exercise and not only for physical health but mental and emotional and just getting outside, finding time for myself.
Depression set in, relationship issues came to a boiling point, decisions were put on hold.
I allowed myself to slowly, and only ever so slightly fall back into some bad eating habits.
And I gained some of my weight, not alot, but some of it back.
That was nearly 8 months ago.
It sure doesnt seem that way. It was a long recovery as I have written about before.
Slow healing and slow climbing back up out of the blue state I was in and getting back into the right frame of mind.
For Scotty, 8 months ago he was dating my best friend and we all went to the mall together on New Years Day, a little trip out of town, I can remember us going out to eat, Golden Corral.
I hadnt broke my foot then and I was very much in lose, stay in control mode, so I was eating protein and salad and veggies.
Poor Scotty couldnt eat the piece of corn on the cob he had chosen, because he had lost most of his teeth.
See, about a year earlier, Scotty was having alot of pain, he got to the point he could barely move.
Went to the doc to see if he had pulled a muscle in his back, only to be diagnosed with advanced cancer of the spine.
He, a once healthy road construction/steel worker, lost down to skin and bones.
He went thru painful surgeries and spent about 50 days straight in Markee Cancer Center at UK.
My best friend stayed by his side thru his illness, paying his bills, doing his banking and doing whatever business he wasnt able to attend to.
After alot of chemo and home health care and stem cell injections...he was in remission.
He and my friend began having relationship issues and broke up not long after I broke my foot. He went back and forth with her thru break ups with another man she was seeing and he kept going back, only to get hurt again. I always wanted to shake him and say "cant you see that you are going to be hurt again, walk away".
But I never felt like it was my place to get involved in my friends relationships.
Scotty, trying to get his strength back, was told to begin riding a bike and now he is in better health.
He rides almost daily and has gained alot of his muscle back.
He still has some weakness and has developed high blood sugar.
But he is out there, pushing, and it was good to see him and gave me courage and enlightenment.
I always think of him as one of my role models when I feel like giving up.
He always encourages me and tells me to keep going.
I sure hope his cancer never returns and he gets much healthier and finds a good companion to be with.
He loves photography and going into the mountains and loves traveling around the southern USA.
I was feeling the endorphins coursing thru my body after a good sweaty one hour walk.
But I drove away feeling even better than I had.
Because my foot is healing.
Scotty is healing.
And we are both still going.