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SUNSHINE65
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Later...

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

The new iPhone is coming soon. The new iPhone is going to have a new feature that actually keeps track of your every movement. Then President Obama was like, ‘Right. NEW feature’. -Jimmy Fallon

Yesterday, President Obama met with the Greek prime minister to discuss reforming Greece’s economy. President Obama talked with the prime minister of Greece about the economy. Actually, it’s ‘the blind leading the blind’. Jay Leno

Yesterday, Obama met with the prime minister of Greece at the White House. When he heard the leader of Greece was there, Biden said, ‘John Travolta’s here?’ -Jimmy Fallon

Anthony Weiner has released a 19-page booklet on how to improve life in New York City. Oh, please. If Weiner wants to improve life in New York City, he should move to New Jersey. -Jay Leno

Scientists have found a new link between high blood sugar and dementia. Which explains Cinnabon's new slogan, "The last bite you'll remember." -Conan O'Brien

According to a Cosmo poll, 13 percent of all men admit they have tried on a bra. The sad part, 43 percent of American men actually need one. --Jay Leno

A new study says that women who drink moderate amounts of alcohol every day lose more weight than women that don't drink at all. At least, that's what your wife will slur to you after she forgets to pick up the kids from soccer practice. -Jimmy Kimmel
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