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    JOURNEY1986   6,149
5,500-6,999 SparkPoints

Even Slow Progress is Still Progress

Sunday, August 18, 2013

Wow - thank you to all of the amazing people who left comments and were so supportive on my last blog (even today they are still coming in Ė thank you so much!) You are truly exceptional people and your support means so much to me. Thank you... just, thank you. You are amazing.

I received a lot of great feedback about my big idea of why I can't stay motivated - because in my head I think/feel/pretend that I'm much smaller than I am and capable of all these cool things that I want to be able to do, like hiking mountains and jogging long distances, etc. I felt kind of silly admitting it out loud and was really surprised that so many other people felt the same way! It was a real eye opener - we really are alike and have a lot in common, and with support we can do this!
I've been trying to work on confronting myself and the truth about myself - my size, my limitations, my capabilities, my goals, what I'm working towards and how it takes to get there. No more fooling myself, time to put the work in so that I can see some real life progress! One thing I've started doing is taking a moment in the bathroom at work in front of the full length mirror to really look at myself. Normally I skim and concentrate on my face, not my body. I'm really looking now so that I can get a clearer mental image of myself and more importantly, to accept myself. No - I may not look the way I want, but it's just a starting point, like blue prints to build on.

There was something in a comment someone said and I had one of those ďa-haĒ moments where something just clickedÖ I need to learn to love my body Ė itís MY body, it doesnít belong to those who are judging me. When Iím out and about Iím so busy wondering what people think I look like and if they are judging me and if my rolls are showing or if my clothes match. I spend so much time caring about what other people think Ė if they like me, if they donít like me, if they are comparing me to someone Iím standing next to, if theyíre thinking about me at all Ė that I forgotÖ my body is a precious thing, and itís MINE. Itís always felt like someone elseís, because all I cared about was what THEY thought about both my body and me. But itís MINE. Itís mine to take care of, to keep healthy, to do what I want with it. Iíve been so irresponsible with my body. I owe it to myself to treat myself better.

I moved my candy/goodie stash at work into the candy dish on my desk to get rid of it, and in less than two days it's practically gone. Good for me, since i don't eat out of my dish but others do! Spreading a little sweetness while getting rid of my stash! In the future I can keep in mind that just because I have a craving doesn't mean I need to go buy a whole bag of something for "future cravings." For example, I bought a middle sized bag of m&m's when I could have just paid a quarter at the vending machine to satisfy my craving. But because I bought the bag because it's more for my money and I can eat it at future times for future cravings I would munch on it just because I had it. I even caught myself reaching for the bag the other day just because I was listening to a movie on my IPod that had m&m's in it and I so without thinking anything other than "m&m's do sound good right now" I reached for them. Luckily I stopped myself and thought to myself, "you don't have a chocolate craving and you're not hungry - you're only reaching for these because you just heard m&m's on your IPod. you don't really even want them, just put the bag back." It made me think of all the times I ate something while watching a movie just because it was habit, not because I was hungry. Or because that movie had a certain food in it that I then wanted just because I saw it on the screen, no real craving for it. I ended up giving away the rest of the bag of m&m's, hehe.

Last night I was having trouble sleeping and an infomercial came on. Just like so many times before. It was for a workout DVD Program, just like so many times before. And I got all caught up in it and started to really think about ordering it. Iíve done this before Ė Iím the owner of several fitness programs and Iíve never even finished one of them. Iíve never even done all the workouts on any of them. But I caught up in the ordering process and started to place the orderÖ for INSANITY.

I came to my senses before I hit the final confirmation button, but I felt a pang of disappointment. I wanted to purchase the INSANITY programÖ even though I wanted all the others too. This one is only 60 days, has great results, I went onto to read reviews and there were a ton of great reviews with great results (the majority of the negative reviews were about injuries though Ė yikes!) Well, this morning I was still thinking about the programÖ only 45 minutes a day, 60 days, drastic results, etc. I can do thatÖ canít I?

Well I hope so, because turns out the order took last night because when I went to check my e-mails I had a confirmation e-mail. It should ship within 24 hours and be here within 3-5 days. Updates to come on that.

To finish up, I had a lot of comments on the following quote on my last blog so Iím reposting it: "Many People Quite Because Progress is Slow... Even Slow Progress is Still Progress"
And as a reminder to myself I need to remember - I owe it to myself to treat myself better.

I hope you all have a Sparktastic Day!

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
MSKRIS7 8/20/2013 7:09AM


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1STATEOFDENIAL 8/19/2013 1:46AM

    Sounds like you're learning to be more mindful. Work on recognizing your choices and what is motivating your choices. This will help you recognize your triggers (like the m&m thing) so you can overcome them.

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NALAYB 8/19/2013 1:04AM

    Slow progress is always better than none at all. Mine is also at a slow pace. Have been at it on and off for awhile now. But people regularly notice so it will pay off in the long run! As for Insanity, I am sure with your motivation, you can do it. I am on my last week and it really is hard work. Read people's blogs and you will learn a lot on how to cope with it. Just last week, I was ready to almost give up but people still pushed me so I am here pushing to work harder. You will not regret it. My weight loss isn't as much but the fact that people notice that changes have happened is a big victory for me.

I am sure you can do it! Have a great day working out and enjoy every INSANE minute of INSANITY! We are all here for you!

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CICI510 8/18/2013 9:13PM

    I really needed to hear your ah-ha moment because that totally clicked with me too! Thank you SO much for sharing!

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ANRRN12 8/18/2013 4:23PM

    Great blog! And great quote, so fitting for my mindset right now. Thank you! emoticon

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WINDY01 8/18/2013 4:10PM

    Good read! Thanks for posting a great blog!
I figure if I didn't take a step backwards, I did make progress!

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WOUBBIE 8/18/2013 2:13PM

    The corollary to that quote is a motto: "Progress, not Perfection!"


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