Sorry I haven't blogged in a while.
I needed time to focus more on myself. My 24 year old son's obsessive compulsive disorder took over my life and my husband's life through his anorexia. He can be very manipulative -- who wants to see their child not eat when they are severely malnourished?
Through a lot of thought and focus and anger I realized this and decided:
1. It isn't fair to me and my family
2. It is feeding my son's OCD even more
So, I am working on getting myself back. Yes, it is still sad and he is still very ill, but dwelling on it isn't helping me at all. I am sure I will occasionally mention him, but I cannot focus on it 24/7 so don't be surprised if I don't bring him up all the time. I do appreciate your continued prayers for him :)
So... what have I been up to you ask?
A couple months ago I signed up for the Philadelphia Rock-N-Roll Half Marathon. It is being held September 15. I figured it would get me motivated to start running again. For a while there, I thought I was going to drop out. I hadn't run in 9 whole weeks!
Well, I started back running last week. I am running at a slower pace to get my muscles and lungs back to a good flow (and not burn out!) I am up to 5 miles. I plan to run 3 - 4 miles on my short run days. I will run a 6 mile run the early part of next week and 7 miles next weekend. I should be at 10 in a couple weeks. I will run 10 a couple times before the race and should be set.
It won't be my fastest but the fact that I am doing this and will complete it with so much going on will make it such a fantastic personal victory for me.
When I started back to running a couple weeks ago my mind was so cloudy with all the negativity of my son's illness. I was feeling very sorry for myself and thought about it the whole time I ran. I wasn't really motivated to train but did it anyway. I just kept thinking "Just Keep Going". Today while I was running I realized I am not thinking about it the whole time I am out there anymore. I am paying more attention to my running music and thinking about other things I have to do or new ideas or the race that is coming up or races I have run. I realized the Philly race is almost one year to the date of my first 1/2 marathon. I am not in shape like I was last year - darn it! - but I am still going!
And...I will slowly get back there now that we are not eating out all the time.
We did get a new addition to our family this summer!
My son got a new dog, Maizey. She is a 1 1/2 year old Boston Terrier. Here she is with Roxy on the boat...
To add to our chaos, she now lives at our house, too, while he is "recovering" and staying at our house. Roxy is the boss, has lost all of her bottom front teeth proving it while fighting/playing with toys!
I hope you are having a fantastic weekend! Thanks for your continued support!