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I am so sad, I am so tired. I am grieving.

Friday, August 09, 2013

I am just moving slowly....nd I feel so sad and like I am in a bad dream. Walking in ways I don't want to walk but then,, I think I have to do this. There is so much out of my control, I just need to accept this, I know. I need to leave it with God and take the next step. Tracking is a priority; I cannot stop that. I am so sad. I need to rest. I need to exercise more -- I'm feeling this from the inside (when I started SP, I had such resistance to this).

There was a beautiful piece sung at our Wedding.
By George Herbert, to music by Vaughn Williams.

The Call
(from Five Mystical Songs)

Come, my Way, my Truth, my Life:
Such a way as gives us breath;
Such a truth as ends all strife,
Such a life as killeth death.

Come, my Light, my Feast, my Strength:
Such a light as shows a feast,
Such a feast as mends in length,
Such a strength as makes his guest.

Come, my Joy, my Love, my Heart:
Such a joy as none can move,
Such a love as none can part,
Such a heart as joys in love.

Becoming so heavy was a product of not really know how to love myself. I need to do that now.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Thank you. I am very grateful to all for your comments, wishes and counsel.
    1660 days ago

    Comment edited on: 8/10/2013 12:24:28 PM
    Remember the words to that song. Try to be in good spirits, and you can do it.
    1660 days ago
    1660 days ago
  • SLACHETKA103145
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    1660 days ago
    1660 days ago
    Grieving with all your heart is a tremendous step toward loving yourself...one foot ahead of the other. We're all with you on your journey.

    1660 days ago
  • CHERYLA2012

    Sending good thoughts and vibes your way!
    1661 days ago
    Hmm....I think now is the time to think about seeing your physician. Tell him/her what is going on. He/she may prescribe something for this. It is your health that you are protecting. Your self that you are caring for. This is one way to do that.

    You have been under a lot of stress. Your body's supply of cortisone is limited, and is designed for sprints, not marathons. You are in a marathon, and your body doesn't have the cortisone to deal with it. You are in mourning, which is an expected phase in this process. If it deepens, you may be putting your life in jeopardy. It would be wise to hedge your bets.

    Keeping on keel at this time may be quite difficult, and super-human. Don't expect this of yourself and seek help.

    You may be wise also to protect yourself by seeing a counselor regularly if you think that you will need someone to talk to.

    1661 days ago
    I also hope that soon you are in a better place.
    1661 days ago
    I have a suggestion. You can choose to do it, or not.

    Each day get a note pad or the computer if you prefer, but handwriting will have more of an effect. Every time you do something POSITIVE, note it. Don't tear it down, or find negative things about it. Do this for one week. Then let us know how you are doing in a week.

    Are you game? Hope so, 'cause I believe you've got what it takes.

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    1661 days ago

    Comment edited on: 8/9/2013 5:49:56 PM
    I'm so sorry you are going through a difficult time. May God bless you.
    1661 days ago
  • JEANNE229
    Hope you find comfort soon.
    1661 days ago
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