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Wednesday, August 07, 2013

I'm gonna tell you a story that you won't believe...I am not sure I believe it myself, but the facts as I am about to relate them to you are true. No names have been changed to protect the innocent...I am guilty, and I am PROUD OF IT!!!

When i was in high school, I had a pair of jeans...not just any pair of jeans mind you...I had a pair of genuine Levis button fly 501 jeans. My recollection is that I found them at a thrift or second hand store, and though they didn't still have the tags on them, they looked, felt, and even smelled brand new. (Hey, I was in a thrift store, yeah, I smelled them to make sure they didn't smell gross. Don't lie, you do too!!!(. Anyway, I bought them for a steal, and they became my favorite jeans of all for the next 8 years or so. I wore them all through my senior year in high school, and then through college, and then through most of grad school. They were size 32...

When I finished my graduate work, I realized I had put on a few pounds. I had bumped up to a size 34, and many of my old clothes, well, I had to squeeze into them like to much packed sausage into too tight skin. If I was honest with myself at that point in my life, i probably should have gone up to 36's, but, we tell ourselves many gentle untruths to help us get through the days, and so there I was, with a closet full of new, larger clothes, and a pile of clothes that just didn't fit.

Well don't you know, I got rid of almost all my smaller clothes, but I held on tightly to those jeans, my favorite jeans, the ones that had been there for college parties, long drives with friends, the ones that had walked with me for several years during the Jimmy Fund walk in Boston, the ones that had provoked so many comments of "nice butt" from the opposite sex. I held onto those jeans furiously for another couple of years until I finally had to admit to myself i had reached the 38 zone and there was no turning back. Those jeans ended up in a bag that went to a men's shelter in my home town, and the end of an era had been reached for me because I knew....I just knew I would never be that size again. (sad music plays, something durgy and perhaps a little celtic).

Life continued, as it so often does, and I stretched and shrank, and stretched and shrank, but I never even came close to that college weight again, and finally, just before NetSue convinced me to start sparking, I had reached the point once again where I was stretching the heck out of my 38's, and knew for sure I'd be in 40's before I knew it. So I gave this place a shot, and with lots of encouragement from people here, the site, and NetSue, the weight started to come off, and I was comfy in my 38's, then down to 36's, and finally made it into a pair of 34', what a rush that was...but nothing compared to what was to come....hold on gentle reader, the pay-off is coming!

Last night, NetSue and I got home from work, had a lovely crock pot beef stew that had been simmering all day, (I have lots of leftovers for future dinners too, yum!), and we were sitting around having an after dinner cup of coffee, when NetSue asked what we should do tonight. I threw out a few suggestions, one of them being to go to the mall for a walk and a look around. She seemed pretty excited by that prospect, and so, like a couple of teenage mall rats, we headed out the door on a date to the mall.

Malls are very cool. There's always so much to see, always so many people to watch doing silly mall things, and the best part of all, my local mall is set up in a circle, and so you can walk it like a track. The mall actually opens early for walkers who want to get some exercise to start their day. NetSue made a rule for us that we weren't allowed to stop and look at anything until we had walked around the mall once. I thought it was a great idea, and so we started speed walking to see how long it would take. A lap around the mall equals one full mile, (we walked it in 13 minutes, despite the crowd of mall walkers who always seem to be stuck in slow gear), and after a good exerting walk, we settled down to do some window shopping.

We stopped in FYE and looked at Dr Who and Dexter toys. We peeked in at some absolutely beautiful dresses, and went to Wilson's to try on some jackets and hats, and look at bags. We were considering heading back home to settle in for the night, but NetSue had one more idea for us that evening. As we headed towards the exit, we passed the Levis outlet store, and NetSue, who has been wondering for some time what size she has really reached, suggested we go in and try on a pair of jeans to find out! I won't steal her thunder and tell you about her experience, (though I will say she looked FINE in the jeans she put on), but I will share mine....

I walked in and started poking to find a pair of jeans to try on. I looked at the Denim Jackets, (yup, had one of those in college too), and a few pairs of the "faded and torn" look jeans, (I've never quite understood those), and peeked at the 560 relaxed fit jeans that had saved my ego so many times in the past with their baggy look, (which I used to fill out to tight quite easily), but I couldn't pick any of those. My heart was pounding just a little, (not from the walk), and I had one pair of jeans in mind, if only Levis still made them. I headed back towards a sign for 501 jeans, and searched through pre faded, light blue, black, and other colors until I found them...a pair of Levis, button fly, 501 blue jeans in dark blue....It only took me a few minutes to scan tags until my eye caught just the right color, just the right size, and I pulled them off the rack, and opened them up, and thought...."Oh GOD, there is no way without a ton of body oil, and about three months of breathing preparation I would every fit into something that small. The legs on 501's are the inspiration for the new "skinny jeans", (though they aren't that skinny), the waist looked like a child's pants size, and there didn't seem to be enough material to get around me. But I was here...I had the jeans in my hand, I had to give it the old college try...

I found NetSue, and we found a dressing room, and I went in to try them on. I took off my shorts, and looked at the jeans for one more second, knowing this just wasn't happening. I'd be lucky to get them over my feet. I then started to pull them on (one leg at a time, hoping I'd at least get them up to my knee on one side), when something....unbelievable happened. My feet slid in, I pulled them up to my thighs, I pulled them, (very slowly cause I just KNEW they would rip), up over my butt, and settled them around my hips...I didn't have to pull, I didn't have to force, I didn't need lube and a full body shave to horse them over my thighs. I had them on....WOW!

The next challenge of course, was to button them. That wasn't going to happen, I was absolutely sure, but....I'd come this far. The lowest button slid easily into place. the next one, just fine, and all the way up to the top, my fingers trembled with disbelief, and my mind reeled with incomprehension, as I made it to the top without having to suck in and hold my breath. There was still a little tiny paunch hanging over the edge, and a bulge in the button fly which didn't look fantastic, but....I was WEARING MY BUTTON FLY 501 LEVIS IN SIZE 32 ONCE AGAIN!!!!!!!! Wow......and it also appears, at least according to NetSue, that my butt still looks great in them!!!

I didn't buy them. I'm going to. I want to get down to my new goal weight of 175 before I commit, but rest assured, gentle reader, when I hit 175, those jeans will be mine again! Oh yes, they will be mine!!!

I never thought I could do it. I convinced myself I could be happy if I could just get rid of the belly and be comfortable, but now I am almost back to the weight i was in college, and it feels better than I could have imagined!! Thank you friends who have encouraged me...thank you NetSue for being the best spark partner I could ever wish for, and thank you spark people, when I buy those jeans, I will take a picture and post it for all to see!! AMAZING!!!

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