Friday, August 02, 2013
Okay, so I've been kind of struggling some lately, and I decided to give myself a shot of motivation. Since my Dad died and all the activity connected with that subsided, I guess I've felt kind of blah and like "is this all there is to my life?"
When I was in California and Dad's caretaker, I had a purpose and felt like I was make a difference in his life - and every day I made him so happy just by being there with him. After he passed I had to get rid of all of his stuff, (and BOY did he have lots of STUFF!), and get his home ready to sell. Then I had to pack up his car with everything I was keeping and drive back to Wisconsin (the longest drive of my life - I'll never do something like that again).
But now that's all in the past, and though I have many good memories to cherish from my time with him, I just don't know where to go from here. My nest is almost empty - except for an almost 15 year old son who really ISN'T into spending time with Mom these days. Plus I'm aging fast and feeling like a failure in several areas of my life.
Anyway, this morning I contacted a couple of Spark friends who I've walked with in the past (okay it's been a couple years, but still). I SparkMailed them, gave them my phone number, and hopefully at least one of them will walk with me this weekend.
Eventually I should probably aim to walk with someone on both days of the weekend every weekend - that would get me off my butt and out of the books I'm always reading! Honestly, reading is a wonderful thing - but sometimes I need to put the book down and actually LIVE a little and connect with friends!