Monday, July 29, 2013
Well here we are at crunch time...Friday evening my daughter flies home and my BFF drives out to help keep me calm and make me laugh a lot and do whatever she can to help.
Still working on patio project...I know it will get done
Everything seems to slowly be fitting into place. Only had garage sale one day as Saturday we woke up to heavy rain. Hubby got rid of a lot of things for just one day.
Took Mom to church and then to breakfast. She saw an order go by and wanted one...which was a change from her normal and wanted it and then told my hubby later I made her order it and she didn't want it. She was a pistol. I try to start out positive and uplifted and when I brought her home so hubby could take her grocery shopping I was drained and so tired of her whining and "oh poor is me" attitudes. She says we won't have time with her due to wedding preparations and she'll be all by herself. I have decided I'll ask her to have dinner with us or invite her along but won't beg her and cajole her. If she says "No"...it will be "NO". Then to find out I'd FORCED her to order something she didn't want...really got me. Then I go through feeling guilty...our only parent left. I so want her to feel wanted and loved and yet she is so negative and manipulative and sucks the life out of me....I don't want to live with regrets and cherish our time with her. Thinks people are in her house stealing from her when she is gone. Things keep disappearing. Then I tell myself - let it go...let it roll off...don't let her loose my joy. Came home and took a short nap and felt better. Puttered around and kept doing little projects...chipping away at the list. Have to learn to find a way to fill my joy back up after times with Mom.
Took Mom to friends home Saturday night for a birthday cookout. It was nice to sit outside and listen to the whipperwill and look up at the stars and enjoy God's handiwork. My friend has huge sunflowers and cut a handfull for Mom to take home and arrange. She cried she so enjoyed the flowers. Said she really enjoyed herself and was glad she went.
In two weeks wedding will be history. Told daughter they should send parents on a honeymoon...said we could come and stay at their condo while they are gone...but my vacation time is about gone...now!
Off to make it a great week. Learning to love and appreciate my mother in law and try to understand her and what she is going through. Just need to remember to find ways to fill myself up after being around her.