Well, the original title of todayís blog was going to be ďIt is what it isĒ. I felt like, losing one half pound is all Iím destined to do. **BIG SIGH** Then something changed and Iím hopeful again.
Iíve got a confession to make: Iím a hot mess.
I mean, Iíve been WONDERFUL with working out Ė thatís what I do and I do it well (not bragginí just sayiní).
Iím off for the summer and, despite doing quite a lot of keeping of a certain 3 year old (who now lives with us, as I may have mentioned), I work out between 6 and 7 hours per week PLUS we go places/do things (Elia and I). I think thatís pretty good for a woman with fake knees!! My swimming is coming right along. I feel stronger when I walk, with less back pain, and I can ride my stationary bike for a good 20 minutes (longer if I need to).
But Iím not eating right. Iím not doing my best to stay in control AND MY NUTRITION TRACKER looks PERFECT. So yep, Iíve been lying!! THIS MIGHT BE WHY THE SCALE HASNíT MOVED!!
After I came home from Texas, I just KNEW there would be a difference!! I had eaten well. I had walked and swam daily. I had NOT snacked in the evening and NOT overworked out. So what happened? I lost one half a pound (again Ė no Iím not even to a 10 lb loss yet), maybe a little less. My body just didnít budge and my foods were healthy and varied, rich in fruits, vegetables, and healthy fats. I felt like I was starving until I focused on the veggies. They (and the fruit) saved me. I was honest that week on my tracker. I WILL SEE MY DR ON TUES to know if there is an issue or if this is how it will work from now on.
I was pretty disappointed. Then, I got mad.
Sure, I still worked out, cuz thatís what I do. But I just started eating MORE of my healthy foods (like the light spaghetti cheese I make or having extra starches Ė cauliflower mashed potatoes or Iíd make a tiny meal out of chips before supper). In my world, ice cream is an entire food group! So Iíve been eating LOTS of that. But still, I thought I was ďgoodĒ (due to working out) even though Iím eating very ďbadĒ. (yeah, I know ďall or nothiní ď thinking doesnít help either!).
But today I got hopeful. No, not because I felt good either. But because the over sodium of last nightís popcorn/chip fest (or is it the weather change?) made me feel AWFUL. Without meaning too, I ate less. We went to the store and I came home STARVING. I remembered Iíd gotten some kale. Now I DO NOT LIKE kale. Iíve been trying to eat it all summer. Iíve boiled and cooked with spices. Iíve really tried and I really hate it! But a friend had told me about tossing it in light olive oil and adding a little sea salt. Then, upon baking them, the kale becomes ďcrispsĒ. OH MY YES!! I thought upon eating it. It was tasty and I feel successful.
Then I remembered one of the reasons I started Spark: to be healthy and strong enough to run with/after my granddaughter, Elia. And I have ALL SUMMER!! Wow, I did something right.
And I remembered that weíve eaten healthy all summer, I just need to watch my portions. And I can eat light or less ice cream. And I can do this, EVEN IF ITíS one half pound per week every week for the next two years!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So Iím hopeful again. Iím going back to the kitchen. Tonight is chicken night, so I like to make little red potato salad with that and maybe a little more kale . . .