Saturday, July 27, 2013
My blog here on Spark People is a catch-all thing. An "olla podrida" (a phrase I know from crossword puzzles). I meant it to be all about my weight-loss and exercise commitment. I have discovered how inextricable my emotions are from my weight-loss.
I have written some very strong emotional things here and it is cathartic. I never used to write much about myself and that was the part of me that craved expression but I tamped it down with eating.
You know what? Everyone has a perfect right to be upset about deaths in the family, job losses, every day failures large and small, losses of all sorts. That is the compound of life along with the birth that is fervently desired or the outcome that is a true blessing.
I have written about the good and the bad and the ugly and the beautiful. I try not to compartmentalize things. When I compartmentalized I had a compartment for my thoughts that was physically expressed in belly fat and shortness of breath. I have been candid in my blogs and that has helped me.
Some days the victory is evading a delicious risotto and other days the victory is being able to speak---of survival and contemplation.
We should all learn to love ourselves. I love it that I am speaking out about my memories and I sincerely hope that if I write things that are uncomfortable to read, that you can just move along.
I think that the blogs here are not meant to entertain but meant to act as a critical aspect of the healing that most of us "fat people" need to work on. It is better medicine than mainlining pasta!