Sunday, July 21, 2013
I have been REALLY struggling lately and got about as far off track as I could (not intentionally). I haven't been a binge eater ever that I can recall but out of nowhere and I mean nowhere, my body wanted bad food and there was nothing that I could do to avoid it. Even the good food, I couldn't get enough of. I would intend to eat one protein bar and I would find myself surrounded by 3 wrappers and that was AFTER I had already eaten a meal.
This has never and I mean never happened to me before and I don't know why it did now. I have a suspicion that hormones were involved and still could try to rear their ugly head (ladies, I think you know what I mean. Gentleman, sorry). It was a truly scary time and the entire time I knew it was bad and wrong and each morning I would say o.k. that's it, get serious and then something else took over. It really, truly scared me and I needed help but me ask for help.... not easy to do.
But TODAY is the day....back on plan, back on fitness, time to get serious again and
s this is me asking for help; asking for support; asking for whatever you can give me. Please....
I was so proud of myself for hitting that 40 pounds lost mark this time around, 80 pounds total, and realizing that for the first time in years I was getting close to my goal size and weight and was starting to even have moments where I was thinking I wasn't so horrible to look at. I was enjoying those feelings and was feeling good about me. Than disaster. I want to get back to that, I want to hit my goal and enjoy wearing clothes and I need to feel good about me.