Sunday, July 21, 2013
I was musing in my journal recently, and I caught myself wondering (in free thought writing) how to be a happier person, even as I was beating myself up over mistakes I've made (in the same free thought journal entry). Well - how can I be happy if I'm also going to belittle myself? That won't work.
The problem is -- belittling yourself doesn't motivate you; it de-motivates you. So, I thought about it, and thought about it (and read articles on motivation) and here's my solution: Acknowledge, Accept, Analyse, Advance
1. Acknowledge and Accept: Don't say "yes, but...". Just give the facts. Accept that it happened.
2. Analyse. This part is tougher -- yes, that happened; yes, I can do better... But, why did I do it? This is key -- because if I know *why* I did it, I'm less likely to do it again, right? There will be signs to watch for.
3. Advance. Now, make goals so I will be able to move forward. Tangible things.
This past little while has seen me make a number of mistakes, and going into detail on all of them here would take forever. So - here's the first one I wrote down; it's probably the key to most of the others, and certainly has many of the same root causes.
Acknowledge and Accept: I gained weight and got discouraged; I gave up on my healthy, mindful eating, gave myself permission to drink beer again, and backed way, way off on my exercise. Okay. That happened -- You were doing great, then you weren't. You can, and will do better - just get back on the horse, and everything will be fine.
Analyse: What happened? I looked at that scale and got discouraged, and ... well, I had been a bit... panicky... about the changes in me. This journey is a good thing; but it's scary, too. Going from well over 200 pounds to (hopefully, someday) well under 200 pounds is a big move. On top of this, I have other stressors in my life (because I'm moving countries, there are family issues, and I'm trying to change careers), and of course I had a setback. It almost seems inevitable.
Advance: Now, to move on! I'm rededicating myself to the changes. I deserve to be healthy; I deserve to be slim; I deserve to be happy. So - what are my goals so I can be healthy and happy?
1. Exercise 20 minutes daily
2. Go back to the food tracker - it is my friend
3. Do 3 yoga poses in the morning (thanks Titans!)
4. Meditate for 10 minutes every night
5. Keep writing in my journal -- that clearly made the difference here.
Last thing? I'll remind myself every now and again that there's no rush. It isn't a race, it's a journey.
How can I be a happier person? Accept myself as I am.