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    FITGRL124   122,590
100,000-149,999 SparkPoints

It's not working

Sunday, July 21, 2013

Whatever it is that I "think" I'm doing, is not working. emoticon emoticon


Well, I stay diligent with food choices, Monday to Thursday and then POW! Friday arrives and here it is. Ice cream, eating out twice, having a couple beers. Seriously?!?!? I had the Friday blues conquered (or so I thought) and yet recently, I've fallen back into those old habits. The question is not really how, but why?

I do not have all the answers. I do have some theories.

1. I am not happy in my work life.
2. I am upset that I cannot do all the exercises that I want to.
3. I am tired of being tired. (Not physically, mentally).

Now, how can I change this?

Honestly, I don't know. And I think that's one of the reasons that I'm in a rut. I go to these foods in excess when I'm upset, depressed, whatever you call it. The question always remains. What can I do?

I'm sorry that I've been a "Debby Downer" lately but I can't shake it and the whole while I just keep feeling more chubby and the scale keeps increasing AGAIN. The scale was 150 on Friday. So, here I sit, 150 AGAIN when just a year or so ago, I was 138.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
JANISMKW 7/24/2013 5:00PM

    A couple of people have told me lately not to be so hard on myself, including a SparkFriend with no info and just "had a feeling" she should say that to me.

So today instead of saying "my hair looks horrible" I said to myself I should take time to make myself a haircut appointment, I deserve to be on my list.

I think being positive gets more results. Beating oneself up is not motivating, only demoralizing.

Acknowledge what you have done well up to now and what you can choose to do and accomplish going forward. You deserve to be treated well!


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SEATTLE58 7/21/2013 7:42PM

    Oh my dear friend, all I can say is try not to beat yourself up so much. Life is what it is, a life long time of this changing that we want to take place. It's over a time of years that you/me have to do this. Because it's a change little by little and then all the littles add up to big changes, things that will be instilled into your new life and will last the rest of your life. These things won't happen overnight. Do you know that when I was recently at my RA appt., which went well by the way, my Rheumatologist told me that I only had 5-8# more to lose?! I just about fell off the chair and then on top of that, he said that I have until I'm 75 to lose it! Huh?! I'm 54 now so that's over 20 more years to lose it?! No, I sure hope to lose it before then and I sure hope to lose more than 5-8#!! So see, sometimes we can be so hard on ourselves. I agree with another one of your friends who asked if you do a certain hobby?! Do you know that the 3 months before our daughter got married, I worked and worked hard on finishing an embroidery pc. for their wedding and in those 3 months, I lost 12#! That was the start of my weight loss. I didn't change a thing except keep my hands more busy so they weren't grabbing whatever and getting my pc. all stained! So that's a thought! Embroidery, quilting, painting, any kind of craft. I'm thinking that your knee could take the embroidery, etc. Just hang in there sweetie, and don't be so Debby Down, you're worth so much more than that! Loving you girl and I'm always here for you.

Karen emoticon emoticon

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TRENTDREAMER 7/21/2013 4:41PM

    "Well, I stay diligent with food choices, Monday to Thursday and then POW! Friday arrives and here it is."
* For me it was about establishing a realistic baseline of bad eating and then fixing it part by part when I was at my starting weight. I lost 20 pounds while eating some of the most horrible quality high calorie lunches every day. I adjusted other meals and snacks throughout the day (really slowly with the focus on adding healthy foods, not "being good").

At about the 210 pound mark, I started chipping away at the lunch. I wouldn't get both the mac & cheese and potatoes as sides (would get corn or green beans in place of one). Then I would ask the person serving me to give me smaller portions of the starchy sides (because they were too much, not because I wanted to be "good"). Did the same with the main entree.

Towards the end, when I was about 200 pounds, I was daily getting about half of the normal size entre,1 vegetable and about half of the starch side dish. The rest of the small decisions for other meals had added up so that the original sized lunch was too ridiculous to even consider. It was gradual.

** Believe me, before Spark People I did the "eat really well" and then "fall off of the wagon" thing. It was not fun and it's a never ending cycle until you end it. **

Whatever you do, don't make this a religious (good/bad) or will-power battle. You will always feel self-judgmental when you "fall". If you haven't won the will-power aspect yet and aren't really doing anything differently, you probably know deep down whether you'll win this time or not.

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    Yep,know what you mean. I CAN do the exercises I want but it just seems so much harder lately and my motivation has been seriously lacking. Plus I feel like it just makes me more hungry to eat more and so I haven't felt motivated to do it anyway. I am still trying, but it's so hard.

I have a friend who is on MFP and we went to school together. We used to have almost the exact same measurements (we had to measure for a body fat lab in school one day) Well, in the last year she has had a baby and since then has bypassed me in weight loss and is at 132 now and I'm still stuck at 145. Ugh!!! I feel like man she had a baby and is thinner than me. I keep beating myself up but I am trying not to. And now she wants me to go shopping with her for new clothes but I just feel so jealous and bad that I can't do it for myself that I might turn her down on the offer.

I wish I knew the answer. Also, last night, I ate after I ended my food log. (which has been happening a lot lately) I just kept snacking and snacking: a pack of graham crackers, half a bag of pretzels, caramel corn, grapes, etc. UGH! OF course wake up this morning feeling terrible.

I really have no excuses. I don't know why I can't seem to get on the ball again.

I don't think you need to feel like you're being "debbie downer". You're just expressing your struggles and trying to figure them out for YOURSELF. So I say, the more you can pinpoint your feelings and figure out what is holding you back, the better. You don't have to be all positive and sunshine all the time, that's just unrealistic. Hang in there, Becky!

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SOFT_VAL67 7/21/2013 3:00PM

    For a minute there, I thought I had written this blog!!
Same pattern with me, only I find myself falling into old bad habits almost daily.
No alcohol since vacation though, that was 17 days ago, but has it made any difference to me calorie wise? not much.
I dont know what is going on with me either, I wish I could help you, in order to help myself as well.
I will give you the advice, I wish I could follow, get as much water and exercise as you can.
Try to blog or journal alot to keep on top of your feelings.
And if it works, dont tell me cause that will mean what i am doing just isnt working for me. emoticon

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ARCHIMEDESII 7/21/2013 2:33PM


I'm a big believer that stress is a neglected aspect of weight gain. If a person could reduce their stress, they'd automatically reduce their waistline. I give all new members one piece of advice and it's this,"Don't look at good health or weight loss with an all or nothing mentality". If the only healthy thing you did for yourself today was drink 8 glasses of water, that's still a step in the right direction.

Stop beating yourself up because you're not perfect. You don't have to be perfect to be healthy.

If you find that work is making your life miserable, then you need to find ways to reduce work stress that don't involve food. Whenever you feel an urge for comfort food, take a walk. Walking is not only great cardiovascular exercise, it's a great way to reduce stress too. Have you ever considered trying yoga ? Yoga is another great way to reduce stress as well as improve your balance, coordination, strength and stamina. Listen to your favorite music. Do you knit, sew, paint ? Take up a craft. Having a hobby can help reduce stress.

There really are better ways to reduce your stress. If you could reduce your stress, you really will be less likely to turn to food for comfort.

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KAYOTIC 7/21/2013 1:23PM

    I've been in a similar boat, but not so much because of the issues you are facing, I think it's more boredom and/or loneliness for me. But that said, can you step back in stages? Maybe one beer rather than 2? Ice cream or eating out? It's tough, but it sounds like you know where you need to be, it's just a matter of how you get there.

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BELIEVING-N-ME 7/21/2013 9:53AM

I know the feeling; I am going through this too! emoticon emoticon

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KIM___ 7/21/2013 9:30AM

    You might want to read Body For Life by Bill Philips. He doesn't have a "Diet", he is all about moderation, eating all the food groups and exercising. I did this previously (lost #40) and it really kept me on track. I've never regained all that weight. He gave me good tools that I still use even when I'm not 'diet/exercising'.

He suggests that you diet and exercise 6 days a week and have one day off. This helped me find out what it was that I REALLY like. Since there is only so much you can eat in one day, I'd save that day for those things I didn't want to give up. It's a day to just relax and enjoy. Your weight loss is a little slower, but it consistent and a great learning experience.

I always thought that doughnuts (from a special bakery) was something I had to eat if they were offered at work. The same with other fast foods that delivered to my work. So, I'd skip them during the week and on my off day I told myself I could go and get as many as I wanted. Turns out I didn't want the calzones or doughnuts (they were just convenient), I ate General Tso chicken and had some ice cream. It was a learning experience that was as valuable as the exercise consistency. I was very good on my "ON" days because at the end of the week I could look forward to my "OFF" day. I can now easily pass up those things at work.

You're doing great. Take it slow and you'll still get there.

Comment edited on: 7/21/2013 9:31:36 AM

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TRYINGHARD54 7/21/2013 9:20AM

    hang it there...... emoticon emoticon

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