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Bedridden by choice? Counting fitness minutes when you don't do

Saturday, July 20, 2013


I know many of balk at the mere idea of anyone counting housework as part of their exercise minutes but I think that's sending out the wrong message. I think whether or not fitness minutes are made up out of housework depends on the individual and situation.

For example, my mother is all but bedridden and has been for too many years to count. She has no physical reason to keep her in bed but she enjoys a good lie down. Her doctor knows about her, the staff at the home where she lives know about it, and I certainly know about it.

By her own admission she is in bed 22 hours a day and this is allowing a very generous two hour time frame for walking to the dining hall (about fifty feet) three times a day and for personal grooming time.

I spent much of my younger years worried to death that I was going to turn out just like her. But, I won't because I'm aware of it and I fight that tendency. Anyway, I've been trying to think up ways to get her on the move. Although we live in the same town it has been at least a month since she has gotten dressed and I've picked her up. This is despite daily suggestions on my part that she come for supper, go for a ride in car, etc...,.

Okay, so I'm sneaky. I suggested to her that the home was probably not washing her clothes thoroughly enough! She must have felt the same way because I've slowly got her into doing her own laundry. I know she has to get out of bed to gather her laundry, separate it, carry it to the laundry facilities down the hall, lift the detergent, remove the laundered clothes and put it in the dryer, fold the clothes and carry it all back to her room where she has to put it away!

Yes, she goes back to her room and lies down while it washes and dries but for those other minutes she is actually on her feet. Why do I do this? Because I love her and all the pleading and begging I've done and all the warnings the doctor had given her she feels she is entitled to lie down. I've lived with her like this since I was 6 years old and, like I said, I fight daily so I don't become like it myself.

Anyway, I'm just in a funk I guess but I sort of got down because I'm not walking like I used to do. My husband says to me "we'll, you didn't acculmulate 36,000 fitness minutes in three years with Spark by being your mother!" Yes, I kissed him emoticon

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    You have a smart and supportive husband. Keep going with the fitness minutes.
    1666 days ago
  • BOVEY63
    Love your hubby's comment! He seems to always be so wonderfully supportive and loving!
    As for your mom, like any addiction or routine, unless she is willing to make the change, there isn't much anyone else can do. I went through that with a dear friend (I was her health care directive and power of attorney) who continued to smoke despite having COPD and needing oxygen 24/7. It was difficult to watch her decline when she could have done more to help herself. I hope the addition of doing her own laundry may inspire your mom to get up and do more.
    1671 days ago
  • _LINDA
    Good for you finding a way to get your Mother out of bed. Its really a shame there isn't something she can take an interest in that would force her to get up and enjoy what life has to offer. Like someone mentioned, is it possible she is depressed? It can be prevalent n families..
    It is a bummer being restricted from getting your usual fitness activity in like you used to, but at least you can still do some and are not totally reduced to being a couch potato! Make the most of what you can do!
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1671 days ago
    You might like the blog I posted after reading yours. You are not anyone besides your own unique self. You're doing the best you can for your mom. Getting her to do her laundry was a wonderfully sneaky good strategy.
    1672 days ago
    No way you are like your mother. Good for you
    for tricking her into doing a few steps. You have
    a wise husband. Have a great day. emoticon
    1672 days ago
  • POPSY190
    Your husband is right!
    1672 days ago
    emoticon ARE GOOD
    1672 days ago
    You have a very wise husband!!!!!!! Also you are a very loving daughter!!!!
    1672 days ago
    Good husband! And he is so correct. I have to tell you, my bed calls to me ALL the time and I fight it off some times and other times I give in to it. We do what we can do and don't sweat the rest. I think you have a very good head about you and resting now and then is not a bad thing. So do it when you want and can and don't make it a daily 22 hour a day occurrence, which I doubt you ever will, bc you are to aware of what it will do to you.
    1673 days ago
    Kisses are good!
    So are you.
    Sneak those minutes in anyway you can Susan. I am feeling in a funk too, from not moving my rear when I know I should.
    Hugs, we all have been there (some like me still are)

    1673 days ago
    Wow, that was very interesting to read because my mother is similar. She doesn't stay in bed but she moves from the bed to the couch and the kitchen where she eats mostly tv dinners. Luckily she lives alone and must feed herself. If someone else was preparing her food she'd never leave the couch. For my part I fight vigorously against laziness just so I don't turn out like her.
    Do you think your Mom might be suffering depression? I wonder that about my Mom.
    Anyway, thanks for posting. Remember, we are not our mothers!
    1673 days ago
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