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The Bridesmaid Dress

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

So, in January I ordered a bridesmaid dress for one of my best friend's August wedding. I had over 7 months to meet my goal. Given my persistent and optimistic attitude and the drive that January 1st brings to so many of us, I decided to order my dress a few sizes too small. I was positive I would reach my goal weight. I'd had enough and nothing was holding me back. I was focused. Driven. Unstoppable.

I was wrong. KIND OF. I am not going to reach my goal weight before the wedding, but I have lost a lot of weight and I'm maintaining a healthy lifestyle. And the darn dress does not and will not fit by August 17th. It's not bad in the waist area but I'll never lose enough inches in the bust by then.

Lucky for me, another bridesmaid (who was pregnant at the time) ordered her dress a size larger...and now her's is too big. (B!t*h!) J/K. So we traded. The larger dress fits me perfectly. And with 5 more weeks to go, I have some time to lose a bit more weight and may even need it taken it a little bit. Maybe.

While I'm so relieved to have a beautiful dress that fits me for my friends wedding, I'm having some mixed feelings about this tonight.

I don't have the stress of needing to order a new dress in time for the wedding or hoping and praying that I can squeeze myself uncomfortably into a dress. That is SUCH a relief! But I hate that I needed the large dress. I hate that it doesn't need to be taken in. I hate that I'm not closer to my goal weight.

Mostly I'm thankful though. I may not be a size 4, like most of the other bridesmaids...but that's ok. I'll only be standing lined up next to them for one day. What's most important is that I never gave up. I've had my ups and downs with my eating habits this year, but mostly I've really improved on my consistency. And it has paid off. I'm losing weight. I'm exercising and I'm eating healthy most of the time. I'm setting a healthy balanced example for my children.

Also, my friend is not shallow. She does not care what size I am. She's one of the best friends I've ever had in my life and I'm honored that I get to be a part of her big day. These insecurities are mine alone (they have nothing to do with her). But I'm dealing with them, acknowledging them, and growing. I'm getting a deeper understanding that while I love fitness and I aspire to be more fit than I am at the present moment, it does not define me. I am more than number on the scale, the flatness of my belly, or circumference of my waist. In fact, I think I'm going to cut the size out of that dress. It doesn't matter. It's a beautiful dress and I'm going to rock it.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Good attitude Tracy ! am happy that all worked out for the best ! You are still beautiful , plus you have those awesome children to show off ! I know you will enjoy yourself at the Wedding at will shine with Beauty - Hugs K emoticon
    1698 days ago
    Most formal dresses are sized much smaller than regular clothing. I hate that about those sorts of things. But just remember that. I used to have a pair of "fat" jeans that were so comfortable, but a size 18. I just cut out the tag, like you said, and wore them with pride (and comfort! LOL!). You have done an amazing job this year with weight loss, especially on top of a move and all that. You will rock that dress simply because you are beautiful, no matter what the size tag says. :-)
    1708 days ago
  • TIGER_LILY_613
    Rock that dress and strut your stuff !!! emoticon
    1708 days ago
    Never be discouraged.....we are not cookie cutter people( no size four for all) as individuals this makes us interesting to our friends ( like the bride) there is an old saying " it is not wise to compare ourselves among ourselves" ( The Bible)
    Just continue making and reaching your goals....a year from now you will be glad you started this year.. Best wishes on your wt loss / healthy food choice journey! You can continue to do this. emoticon
    1708 days ago
    1708 days ago
    What a great blog. You are a success and such a motivator!!!! How nice that you could trade dresses. I think you have made amazing accomplishments. You NEVER gave up!!!! So inspiring!!!! emoticon
    Of course you are going to rock the dress!!!! You are beautiful!!!! emoticon
    1709 days ago
    You will look great on your friends wedding day and enjoy yourself!
    1709 days ago
  • SKATER787
    Wonderful. Sometimes we just put unnecessary pressure on ourselves. I'm glad it's resolved for you. emoticon
    1709 days ago
    Really nice positive post. Your beauty will shine though on your friend's wedding day. Keep up your good work! emoticon
    1709 days ago
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