Tuesday, July 16, 2013
I started taking pole fitness classes on May 20, 2013. I've always wanted to do it, but I must admit I was a bit apprehensive about it. I’ve always been very self-conscious…especially when it comes to my lower region. So entering into a class where short shorts are recommended was very intimidating.
My first class I took wearing knee-length yoga shorts. It wasn’t that bad and there were other women in the class wearing the same thing, but I knew after attempting the first few pole moves that shorter shorts were definitely going to be necessary for me if I wanted to learn the moves and execute them properly. I went out and purchased some shorter shorts, but I still didn’t feel entirely comfortable wearing them to class. I packed them in my gym bag and took them along for the ride, but day 2 was still yoga shorts and a t-shirt.
On day 3, I told myself to suck it up and wear the damn shorts. During that entire class, I was pulling my shorts down as far as they would go to cover up as much of me as they would cover. I wasn’t comfortable with how I looked in the shorts at all. I noticed every roll & dimple in my hips & thighs and I just knew that everyone else saw them too. At the end of one of the classes while talking to the instructor, she complimented me and how great my body looked. Talk about speechless! Here I am looking at every flaw that I see in myself, and everyone else sees sexy. I realized in that moment that the only person focused on my “flaws” was me. No one else saw the rolls & dimples that I focused so much of my attention on. They were too busy working out and trying to get their own bodies right. Women smaller and bigger than me are in these classes wearing their little shorts, mid-drift shirts and high heels strutting their stuff and owning their sexy. By that next week, so was I!
Since I started taking these pole fitness classes, I feel a whole new appreciation for my body and a level of self-confidence that I don’t think I’ve ever had in my 34 years of living. My family & friends can see a change in me. Some have said that they’re glad that I am finally seeing the beauty that they’ve always seen. It never mattered how many people told me I was beautiful or sexy or that I had a great body if I couldn’t see it for myself. These classes have helped me own my sexy and see myself through a new set of eyes.
There are still goals that I have set for myself and things about my body that I want to work on. I am definitely going to continue to work out and tone my body so that there are a few less rolls & dimples. (*smile*) The great thing is my focus has changed. I’m focused on being good to myself, loving the skin that I’m in and making my body the healthiest it can be. Do I still see my “flaws”? Sure I do. The difference now is that I no longer see them as “flaws”. They are my badge of honor as a mother bringing 4 lives into this world. They are “curves” that many women wish they had and some women pay good money to obtain. They are what make me who I am.
I now acknowledge that I am “perfectly imperfect”…just the way God intended me to be.
July 16, 2013
36, 34, 44