Tuesday, July 16, 2013
Sometimes it's hard to see the gifts in the situations or challenges we are presented with. It takes a lot of practice to view the GOOD in all - even those lessons.
Things at home continue to be a bit 'shaky' ... while my youngest is doing 'ok', I am still apprehensive of her mood shifts and she's very delicate and gets set off at nothing. My oldest called home and we got into a heated discussion because she has expectations that when she comes home all this will be 'over' and we won't have to walk on eggshells or have to hide medication and blades, but I explained that I can't guarantee that. It's very difficult being in this position and the lessons keep coming...
The gifts I see in this - well we are all having to learn new coping skills. We are all having to seek out outside help through counseling and for them, yes even medication to help stabilize their moods. While I'm not a fan of this, I do believe at times it's necessary.
My youngest is attending a gymnastics summer camp for the next two weeks, and the gift in this was that I was able to receive financial assistance to get her there.
We have our first appointment with her long term counselor tonight so I'm hopeful that setting this up will continue to help her along. I'm told they also may be running groups for kids and coping mechanisms so I'm hopeful she may be able to participate in that as well.
Me - well I have a meeting setup with my friend for Thursday. Keeping that connection and having that escape has been helping me stay in balance.
While I also know that what I am looking for in terms of 'happiness' and fulfillment is not out there... but rather in me, the gifts I see along the way help me along that path.
So while the lessons keep coming, I am choosing to let them empower me rather than devour me.
On the SP journey front - I'm feeling somewhat frustrated being stuck at the same plateau range I was on for 3 years, but I am going to keep pushing and hope to see 150Land by July 31st! It's going to mean some HARD work, but it's in ME... I Can Do This!! And doing it with YOU my SP friends makes it that much easier!