Monday, July 15, 2013
Life is so funny, I finally found my way back to Spark People about a month ago and I was motivated and ready for action!!! Then life happened...and it shouldn't be an excuse, but the past 15 months for me has really been a roller coaster ride because I had to tell my loved ones that I had been struggling with the disease of addiction, and so I am in recovery (although I've had some slip ups) and learning ALOT but in that learning I am also finding that I really need to make time to focus on me...and it just feels so selfish, but I am trying to come to peace with the fact that this is selfish for a GOOD REASON and that over time my loved ones will also benefit from my selfishness. I have caused so much hurt and wreckage and I am slowly working on picking up the pieces and in turn discovering the person I am truly meant to be because I now know that I had addict behaviors even before the actual "substance problem" and it is humbling to see that. I have decided that while working on my recovery and healing my body, I also want to be a HEALTHIER all around woman so that I can feel better and be more active. Trying to take one day at a time is really the key that I have found works...so this new adventure is both exciting and scary but I feel blessed to have many people around me, including the amazing people I've met in recovery, supporting me and cheering me on and picking me up when I fall.
So buckle up kids...this may prove to be a crazy, twisted ride, but I know the rewards will be amazing!