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I hate to do this, but I am breaking up with you.... on SparkPeople.

Saturday, July 13, 2013

It is obvious that I am doing okay with the exercise aspect of SP. But I do need a boost on the nutrition. If anyone would like to send me more positivity about not getting to eat that slice of pizza and passing on that delicious cheeseburger and fries, I would greatly appreciate it. I feel like I am losing my best friend sometimes when I have to say no to those things. Like, "Sorry, Mr. Yummy, we had some good times, and you tasted delightful, I really do enjoy your company, in fact I think I might love you, but I can't hang out with you anymore. You make me too comfortable. I am gonna go hang out with boring old Mr. Carrot for a while, probably forever, and never see you again. I will miss you every day, I promise." emoticon emoticon emoticon The worst part is when he comes around and I have to ignore him... act like I don't even see him... it's tearing me up inside. I think I may go crazy...
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    Mr. Right is Mr. Wrong. He is Mr. Abusive. He hits you. He smacks you around. He makes you do things you don't want to do. He puts things in your mouth you don't want to go there, all those greasy calories. Yes they taste good for the moment. But remember the saying "a moment on the lips forever on the hips."

    Why would you want to keep an abusive boyfriend around. And then you let his abusive friends in the house too, Mr. French Fries and Mr Pizza. You need to think of only you. Think of your well being and only of your well being. Think about what you would tell your best friend if she were in an abusive relationship. You would tell her to get out. To leave that jerk and his friends. To never see him again. You wouldn't tell her to go back and visit him on occasion.

    SP is about moderation. But greasy food is not good for you in any situation. It is not good for your weight, true. But more than that it is not good for your heart, for your arteries, etc. It is hard for your system to digest. It wrecks your body overall. You wear that fat you put in your mouth on your hips, arms, legs, chin, etc. Is that what you want to see? The bruises Mr Right is leaving you with?

    I was once bruised and battered by a Mr Wrong. No longer. I have met Mr Right. I do on occasion have a healthy homemade hamburger on the grill, 95% fat free on 100 calorie flat bread. Which is actually better than the others. I put lettuce and tomato and onion, ketchup and mustard on it. It is the best burger in town. I would kick it to the curb if it wasn't the best. I don't put crap in my mouth. If it doesn't taste good it doesn't go in my mouth past the second bite. Not worth the calories.

    So don't let Mr. Wrong keep abusing you. You are worth more than that to yourself and to others as well. Stand up for yourself. Kick him to the curb.
    1710 days ago

    Comment edited on: 7/18/2013 7:20:37 AM
    Haven't read all the comments, but I would allow myself an occasional "date" with my favorites. Make it an intentional event-a special occasion. Enjoy, remember, Spark is about moderation, not deprivation. Best to you!
    1711 days ago
  • BARBIE176
    Breaking up is a difficult thing to do, but you will be so glad once you've accomplished it. I find now that when I eat those things I feel so bad that I don't even want them most of the time. I love baked fries. As for the cheeseburger, I think you could find an alternative that will work to satisfy the craving, or splurge once in a great while so that you don't feel deprived. Hang in there, stay focused. You ARE WORTH IT. Work on changing your mindset because I know for me that is half the battle. The little girl in the background should give you a big motivation for achieving success - so that you can play with her. emoticon emoticon because you are emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1713 days ago
    While I was switching to healthier foods I would eat kids meals at McD's
    1713 days ago
    Yes kick that cheese burger to the curb. I did the same 7 weeks ago and you know I hate eating carrots but there are ways to be good to your body and have that burger or slice of pizza . Well.. maybe not that burger but a healthy alternative. Come check out clean eating, yes you can lose weight, fuel your body and actually taste your food. Your family will love it too once you get the hang of it.
    Your little girls smile is beautiful!
    1713 days ago
    It's not fair to compare a cheeseburger to carrots! You set yourself up to fair if those are your only 2 options.
    1713 days ago
  • LDR2008
    Maybe you guys don't need to break up completely...maybe you just need to give him a makeover? You could try a veggie burger with fake cheese when you have a cheeseburger craving, with a side of oven baked fries. My dad (who is a huge meat eater) really likes Amy's Texas Burgers. They have a texture similar to meat and could help with your craving. Amy's Bistro Burger is good too, lots of flavor. For fake cheese, I like Daiya, and they recently came out with slices so now it's really convenient to eat. I introduced my parents to fake cheese (these were people who would get a large pizza for dinner once a week), and now they have switched to homemade pizzas made exclusively with Daiya shredded mozzarella. Another good fake cheese brand is Teese...but I haven't had as much experience with it as I have with Daiya. Both the veggie burgers and fake cheese (of any brand) can be found at Whole Foods or a healthy grocery store or co op.

    As for pizza, you can make your own with some pre-made thin crusts, tomato sauce, fake cheese, plenty of vegetable toppings, and a meat topping. You could also make a mini pizza on a slice of bread or english muffin (with real cheese this time), and also have a salad or bowl of soup to make it more filling (and make it seem like you just went out for some italian food).

    I have found that making substitutions (like fake cheese, or non meat) has allowed me to answer my cravings without being entirely unhealthy.
    1713 days ago
    One slice of pizza, along with a great salad is fine. Half the pizza is not.

    A small burger with lettuce and tomato is fine, unless you have fries and a pop with it and do it several times a week.

    The only reason to never have certain foods is if you really can not handle being around them without eating the whole thing and then some. I can not bring home a bag of Oreos, but to get a single serving size one is fine. I can not have Halloween candy in the house more than half a week ahead of time or I'll eat it all twice before I hand them out.

    In moderation and not sitting at home calling your name are ways I get around it. If it's not convenient, I'm less likely to have any (even with a vending machine in the front of my apartment building).

    I find when I say "I Can't" have something, I want it more. Try telling yourself and others that you "Don't Want" it and you'll feel more powerful about it.
    1714 days ago
    For me, denying myself certain foods was a sabotaging behavior. I try to eat something if I really want it, but I control how much I eat and I supplement the meal with lots of fresh veggies.

    I know that some people can cut out foods and be successful, deprivation doesn't work for me. It took a while to get the hang of modifying my diet to restrict portions of the unhealthy food and increase the veggies. Now I don't have the cravings for the pizza, burgers, etc. because I know that I can have them if I really want them. I do find that I want fresh veggies with every meal now--in fact, I look forward to them.

    Best of luck!
    1714 days ago
    I believe that moderation is key to long term success. If you think of foods as "bad" versus "less nutritious" it is going to be hard to make a lifestyle change that lasts!!! I wouldn't be able to never have pizza for the rest of my life because frankly, it isn't realistic with 4 children and a bazillion activities. I have skipped it a lot of times and had my cottage cheese or protein bars. Or we make pizzas with the greek pita breads from Costco (which the children love) and mine get more veggies. But if we are running around and have to get cheapie cheese pizzas from Little Cesaers, I don't sweat it. I just track it and adjust calories around for the week. Exercise a little more. When I look at how long it will take to burn the extra calories.....suddenly Mr. Magnum ice cream bar doesn't look as good. But I will occasionally enjoy a frozen yogurt. It's finding your balance that builds a strong foundation for success!!!! emoticon
    1714 days ago
  • ELISARA2005
    You could always tell him he can be your foody buddy. Good for a quick hit* in a controlled manner* than pushed back into the shadows of tall upstanding Mr Carrot who makes a mean stir fry, I hear.

    Like Castiron said Breaking up is hard to do but sometimes you just gotta.
    1714 days ago
    I love this! You are a hoot! Had this same mind set in the first weeks...this suffering toally leaves you . I dont remember when but it fades....usually when you meet a great goal or drop a size! Things all healthy things taste great cause you feel great! When I started oh yeah at first everything about the nutrition tracker was all " can't s and not's"....I felt bad for myself. Funny now but I realized that I kept with eating healthy -as my punishment for gaining the weight! I thought to myself "You don't deserve that burger and ice cream because you are bad! Now- HERE. I am 4lbs from my goal weight. I think that food is crap and I deserve better than junk! I am amazing And I deserve the best food. See this through...leave it behind you...the sooner you do the faster you will progress! Great blog!
    1714 days ago
    I hear ya, teammate.
    1714 days ago
    You're being awfully kind and compassionate toward someone who wrecks your life, Sweetheart ;-)~ I'd tell him what a scallywag he's been, that he's been a useless fu**-up and that you have no desire to ever see his cheesy, doughy, greasy, FAT face anymore!

    Don't send him off gently into the sunset, Marci!!!
    Kick his lyin', cheatin', heart-breakin' A** to the mother-lovin' curb!!!

    love you, Girl!
    1714 days ago
    PASSION An incredibly intense and compelling desire for something that is barely containable, I think that's the key.
    Your passion should be so great that makes you want to scream from the roof tops your goals and desires.
    This is the kind of passion that makes you invest in yourself while in pursuit of your dreams.
    Best wishes on reaching your goals and dreams.
    1714 days ago
    Hey, there's no reason that you can't be a two-timer!!! People do it all the time.
    I suggest that you start with Mr. carrot (a portion or two of your vegetables) then go to Mr. Burger/Fries afterward (in a smaller portion than you'd normally do).
    A further suggestion is to have the day planned ahead so you have somethingto look forward to, and help you stay on track.
    1714 days ago
    you can have those things in moderation. I know that's easier said than done but give it try.
    1714 days ago
  • BRADMILL2922
    Sorry to Mr. Yummy. Tell him that its not you but him. Lol! It is hard to do but you will feel much better about things in the long run sticking with Mr. Carrot than you ever could with getting that instant only sort of satisfaction with Mr. Yummy! You are doing great, keep it up!
    1714 days ago
    YOu don't have to give up those things, just do them less often and is smaller quantities---I had been really good all week and Friday I just wanted a burger and a soda---so we went to Hardees--I got what I wanted---was full before the end of the burger and fries so I chose not to finish---and got on the scale on Saturday and had lost 3 lbs this week---so see, you can still have those things, just plan them out. It is like going out to a restaurant and asking for a take out box when your meal is brought---putting half of it in there before you start eating allows you to enjoy your time out without going way over.
    1714 days ago
    You don't have to break up with certain foods entirely. Sometimes, it is okay to have a slice of pizza. Also, you don't have to eat food that you don't like and find boring. I will never eat Spinach. I don't care how healthy it is. Find healthy foods you like and find a balance. It's definitely a challenge but you will see much more progress than going back and forth breaking up with particular foods and then getting into another relationship with them. What you need is just a fling with them once in a while. ;)

    1714 days ago
    Hilarious! But I'm sticking up for Mr. Pizza--he's not inherently bad. In fact, the right kind in the right amounts is quite nutritious (I could never give that bad boy up!). Make it yourself so there aren't secret surprises. Piazza dough is incredibly easy to make. Break off part of the dough--a smallish amount--and flatten it as thin as possible, bread plate size. Divide the rest of the dough into similar balls, put them in Baggies and freeze. Make your own sauce--no sugar is needed--or go gourmet and just smash a tomato with some spices! Get part skim mozzarella, shredded, and don't put it on over thickly--or tear a thin slice. There it is--or add veggies or something non pepperoni.

    Two slices of Paul Newan margherita works.

    Or, if you're really determined to give him a makeover, use a tortilla or pita base.

    He's a reformed bad boy!
    1714 days ago
    emoticon everything is moderation......I know changing your foods & lifestyle is difficult at first but with time believe me it comes natural. But hey we are not perfect, I know I am not *lol*. Yesterday, I bought some Lindt Dark Chocolate & Coconut bar - hubby & I had a couple of pieces as dessert. Was it good ? Oh, yeah. emoticon
    1714 days ago
    I'm going to be the odd one out here, I still don't eat fruit, the sugar content is too high, though I do eat vegetables, but not in huge quantities. I will eat cheeseburgers, and fries, but just not all the time. The way you choose has to be sustainable for the rest of your life, and if I totally give up the things I like, I will simply crash and regain the weight again. So for me the task is to lose weight/get fitter/stay healthy, while not depriving myself of everything that makes life worth living.

    My way is fasting two days a week, and keeping fairly low on carbs the rest of the time. At weekends though I relax a bit more and have a few beers and the odd takeaway. It works for me, not necessarily for anyone else. It means I don't have to count calories. Though I exercise a lot on my fast days, and watch my portion size on my non fast days, but I eat what I fancy.
    1714 days ago
    Lol, fortunately once you give up junk food and sugar, Mr. Carrot becomes a whole lot more exciting. Since I said no to sugar and pop, fruits and vegetables are a heck of a lot tastier. Today I was going to allow my self to have a cheat meal- French toast sticks or waffles or pancakes. Then I saw fresh pineapple chunks... Helloo, gorgeous! Needless to say that the gluten and sugar laden crap didn't make it onto my plate, but a cup of succulent, sweet and juicy pineapple sure did. Then again I get excited when I see fresh broccoli or asparagus in the chow hall... Maybe I'm just weird? Anyway, your Mr. Pizza is bad news. He is an abusive boyfriend. He sweet-talks you with his fatty, carb-laden goodness, but he hurts your body and your self-esteem. You know you want to break up with him, but your well-meaning friends bring him around to tempt you back into his clutches. Like any toxic relationship, this one needs to go! Don't let Mr. Yummy abuse you!
    Did you giggle at my comment? If you did, good! Next time you will see a slice of pizza you will probably see in your mind an image of an abusive dirtbag, and won't be tempted to eat it anymore. Good luck with the break up, and here is to healthy new you!
    1714 days ago
    Cute! You picked the right guy for this time in your life!
    1714 days ago
    1714 days ago
    took me awhile to get past that point as well. what i try to concentrate on is how im going to feel afterwards - would i rather be sluggish and have an upset stomach? or would i rather have tons of energy? i also try and focus on WHY i'm craving something bad for me. its usually emotional rather than actually being hungry. of course, if we could easily make those conscious choices every time we ate, none of us would be on sparkpeople trying to lose weight. so if i give in to temptation, i try to just shrug it off and do better next time. it took me several stops and starts and failures until i was finally content with eating healthily, rather than seeing it as a punishment.
    1714 days ago
    I'm proud of you! You did wonderful!
    1715 days ago
  • JRAY864
    Okay... my favorite foods are steak and potato chips. Yes I miss them. But, I look at all those thin girls and want to be one. I mean I really WANT to be one of those thin girls. So I look at my picture and see how just how fat I have become, then I can pass on the chips and the steak. Will that work for you?

    Also, try something beside boring Mr. Carrot. I love sugar free popsicles - 10 calories each, they take a while to eat if you lick and don't bite - and they taste like heaven. Or try nectarines, the riper the better for a sweet treat. But put your fat picture, if you have one on the cupboard or the fridge. You won't get thin with out restricting calories.

    But also, once a month or so, make a date with a cheeseburger - but make it at home... lean beef, low calories cheese, baked french "fries". You won't be sorry, and you will cut the calories in half or more. After dinner take a long walk with your bestie!
    1715 days ago
    Breaking up is hard to do, but now that you have witnesses....
    Keep up the good work and have fun with the beautiful little girl on your background.
    1715 days ago
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