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Lurking and friending ... And unfriending

Saturday, July 13, 2013

I am doing some tidying up.

When I started sparking I didnt understand that you could follow people's blogs without friending them. But now I do. Some people have hundreds or thousands of friends, it must be so hard keeping up with them! I don't try having a relationship with those folk, and very rarely post on their blogs. Sometimes I give them a goodie. But mostly I would be lurking.

Sometimes I am on a mission and get all self obsessed and only focus on myself. That's OK. After all, I am on SP for me.
But the spark community is so important, it is everyone out here that inspires and motivates and offers practical advice and insights.
It's all a matter of finding a balance.

I like to have a manageable number of friends. Hey there, Fifi's friends!
emoticon emoticon
Even if we aren't interacting regularly, I do try to get round my friends every now and then. I may not always comment on your blogs, if I don't have anything to add. But I think you can tell I'm around, because every now and then, I respond to your achievements, or check in on your page.

I'm having a tidy up at the moment. I am unfriending some Sparkfriends who have become inactive on sparkpeople, and others who seem never to interact with me. I figure they won't notice, but it feels a bit uncomfortable.

Have a great weekend, Spark buddies.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I do this at least once a month. I just wrote a blog about it to so that any one I deleted as a friend would understand. Like you though, it still makes me feel kind of bad. Not like guilty but in a sense that you want to keep them around as your friend but I snap out of it as I notice that they are not active, have over 50+ friends and do not interact with me either so...I keep my friends list 25 and under...I do not go over 30!
    1557 days ago
    Good idea. Do you think people notice when you"unfriend" them? I mean, does Spark send a notification to your e-mail like they do when someone "friends" you? I guess I could check to see if you kept me as a friend and then I guess I'd know! In any event, I think the pruning is a good idea.
    1557 days ago
    I do that every now and again. The first time I felt like you did so I became more careful of adding friends. Now I look at all Spark people as friends but I may not have them labeled.
    1557 days ago
    You're doing the right thing. It's impossible to keep up with everyone and we just don't get close to everyone. I need to do this, too.
    1557 days ago
    Fifi, It is a good idea, I am not sure I even have that many friends or how to manage them. Maybe I am not being such a great SP friend. But I was also thinking of cutting down on the teams I joined as I only really follow one or two and when I first started in a fit of enthusiasm I joined many. Must learn how to do that too.
    1557 days ago
    Managing life is a good thing. I don't need a lot of friends, only supportive and friendly ones!
    No matter how far apart we are!
    1558 days ago
    Nothing wrong with a "life laundry"
    1558 days ago
    Hey! Just wanted to let you know that I do the very same thing! Someone will ask if we can be friends, and I will friend them, only to end up being ignored! I give them a month or two, and then, if I don't hear from them, I remove them as friends. I am like PONYFARMER, if they can't send me a message or hit the "like" button on my feed, then I don't need them as friends. I usually have about 50 friends or so, and that is really too many to keep up with! You are so right! You are on Spark People for YOU! emoticon
    1558 days ago
    You sound 'exactly' like me, Fifi as I do the same thing. I always keep my SFs to a manageable 50 or less, but I have noted all the Sparkies who have added me as their friend over the years. One would never have time to interact with them all, so it's only the ones who are pretty active, are the ones I keep as my SFs. Any who don't interact with me for 3 months, I unfriend, and add someone who has friended me in the past (that I haven't reciprocated) and who interacts with me on a regular basis. I hope that all makes sense.

    Have a great Sunday. I'm out to lunch today so shall enjoy! emoticon
    1559 days ago
    I have done the same thing, and I don't think you need to feel badly at all, I didn't. If there are people who do not even take the time to hit the like it button, which literally takes 1 sec then they are not that into me. LOL! And that is ok, we are all busy and time is short, not to mention that I need to spend more time moving than less time sitting on my butt on the computer.


    So clean up your friends list and do not worry, I doubt they will even notice.

    Just my humble opinion!
    1559 days ago
    Phew. I'm glad I wasn't on the hit list!
    1559 days ago
    I have a good friend who calls what you are doing "editing your life."
    1559 days ago
    Well said Fifi !! Awesome , its very difficult to keep up with so many people. I agree that I have my go to buddies like you and I try to be supportive but your right we are here to improve ourselves and having fun along the way - Besides , I do not feel you are all about you !! We Love you !! Hugs K - have to rest to very hard to stay away from my buddies emoticon
    1559 days ago
    Im with ya on that!You have a great weekend my darling FIFIFRIZZLE!!!
    1559 days ago
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