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    NSMOOMAA   3,125
2,500-3,999 SparkPoints


Saturday, July 13, 2013

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I have been doing lots of thinking, thinking and thinking lately. I have been trying to understand myself a little when it comes to eating healthier and working at getting my excess weight off.

I feel like I am my own worse enemy, in fact I know I am.

Monday's will always come! (at least as long as I am on this side of the grass). Also tomorrow will always come. WHY do I sabotage myself?? I can do this, I know I can. I really do like myself for the most part. When it comes to doing other things I get my back up, I can be tenacious, I can strive until I do it, yet with this problem...I am befuddled or maybe not?

I chose my emoticons for a reason. The face is perplexed, as I do a lot of self reflection. The walker is because right now with torn hamstrings and pulled gluts, I need it to get around a bit. The sun because it is a beautiful day and I am very thankful to be alive. The turtle to remind me that I must remember to do it, one day or one step at a time. Perhaps one meal at a time.

I did not get fat overnight. I will not lose it overnight. I want to be healthier!! I want to fit into nice clothes. I want to live.

Trying to understand myself has led me down many paths. I am not sure which one is correct, or if they may all or in part contribute to my failure. I am generally happy in my life!! Except for my weight.

So I am working on daily reflections that include this problem along with my other daily reflections. This blog spot will be boring for a bit, I am afraid. I must do this.

I went back to school last year at age 56 and graduated with honours!! I was older than anyone else in the class, including the instructor. I now need a job. Have been applying, time will tell. I was a nurse and because of health reasons, I can no longer work in nursing. I took Medical Office Administration. I just worry that employers will not consider me because the pay as an MOA is less than an RN. I am OK with that. I just want to work!!

So I am being positive, I spend a little time talking to myself, before I get up so I am positive from step one. This is good because with the sore muscles, I can't get up too fast. Also at the end of the day I spend time reflecting!! Me time!!

It is a beautiful day and I want to get lots done. So off I go.

Thank you Spark People for being here.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
CANDOK1260 7/28/2013 8:29PM

congrat on your
graduation good luck on your new career

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ANJAYS-JOURNEY 7/13/2013 8:39PM

  you will get there, you are well on your way, you are looking amazing and your leg is getting better, and work will come, when God is ready.
hugs my friend

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ICEANGEL0531 7/13/2013 12:47PM

    You will succeed in whatever you put your mind to do, believe it & you will achieve it!

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Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

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