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it's not the hair, silly

Saturday, July 13, 2013

Back in March, I made an appointment to have highlights put in my brown hair. My hairstylist had suggested that it might be fun to try something new, and I bit. I wanted a change, and highlights seemed the easiest solution.

I hated them.

After six weeks, when the hair was beginning to look brassy and my dark roots were showing through, I went back to the salon to confess that I didn't like what she'd done.

"Oh, it's just that you waited too long to come back," she said. "You really need to maintain these every four weeks or so."

Hm. I didn't think that was it. But I bit, again. I let her touch up the highlights, but this time with a toning product at the end that made the highlights blend in a bit more. The look was better, but still, I wasn't satisfied.

My life hadn't changed with the highlights, and somehow, I was expecting it to.

After one more highlighting touch up, just a few weeks ago, I went back to the stylist. This time I was firm. I wanted my old hair color back.

You see, I'd figured it out, why the highlights weren't doing it for me. It wasn't my hair that I wanted to change. It was my body. I wasn't -- and am not -- comfortable in my skin. But since making the decision on July 1st to fix this problem, to start eating mindfully and to get moving again, I feel better. Even if I've only lost a few pounds so far, feeling in control again is really what I desired.

It wasn't the hair I needed to change. It was me.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Moments of personal insight-sometimes they are painful, but always revealing and certainly help us along our journey-Revisit this blog as you move along-there's a lot of insight here.
    1711 days ago

    I am guilty of trying thing after thing to distract me from what the "real" problem was - being FAT, unfit and miserable. I colored my hair, painted my nails, bought a new outfit, tried a different moisturizer, tried Botox, considered plastic surgery... Guess what? Still fat, still unfit, and still miserable.

    There is no easy, quick fix to what ails me. I need to put in the time and effort to climb back out of this place I've put myself in.

    You're a smart chick to have figured it out after just highlights! Rock on!
    1711 days ago
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