Thursday, July 11, 2013

Well I continue to use up gasoline as if I'm made of money, running to crappy temp agencies in the absence of any other job possibilities. Did I mention how much I hate temp agencies? Yep. Mentioned that just a few hundred times, I'm sure.

I am running down the remaining job leads I have, which are few and nebulous.

Tues morning I went by the Mville temp agency who is hiring for NGK, the 105 degree work place. Previously walkins were taken Tues & Wed morns, but on this day she said to come back Wed (did I mention I hate crappy temp agencies). She confirmed they were still hiring for NGK, I asked if orientation was still Thurs at 3p (b/c last week was dif because of the holiday), and she said yes, I asked if they knew the shift info and start date info, she said no they won't know that for awhile. Stress.

I said my piddly pay job makes next week's schedule today and tomorrow; is there a-n-y way, at all, I could find out or get more info before Thurs? She said no because they don't get the work orders in from the client until Thursday so they themselves don't know yet. Stress.

Heavy sigh. This creates an almost impossible situation for me, re, the piddly pay job. Stress.

Left there and decided I needed to change into more professional clothes at Burger King bathroom before applying at a new temp agency. While driving I thought about how to handle notification to the piddly pay job, especially when I have no facts to give them.

Changed at Burger King then went to a new temp agency in Mville, that I had carefully mapquested and written down. After finally finding them, they had a sign on their door they had moved. Stress.

At the old address, they had posted crappy directions (look for the pink flags at the new address, but there were no pink flags), so I couldn't find them. More wasted gas and time. Stress.

Pulled over to call for directions, discovered phone was missing. Think I took it out of my pocket when I changed clothes. Stress!!!!!!

The impact of losing the phone at this point was staggering. It's my only phone, all my job hunt numbers and personal numbers are on it, and all the applications I've put in have that number, so getting a new phone, which I can't afford, would not solve anything. Had to get the phone back if at all possible.

In a panic, drove back across town way out of my way (wasting more gas) to go back to Burger King, sure enough it was still there on the ledge in the bathroom. Thank You Jesus!!! No one had taken it during all the time of going to both locations for the new temp agency, being lost and driving around, and then driving back to the other side of town.

Discovered the temp agency's number wasn't in my phone, because it was a new agency I hadn't applied at yet. #($*^#&*$! Drove back to the old address to get their number. AGAIN. Like a ping pong ball. More wasted gas and time. Stress.

I never enter "junk" or "maybe" phone numbers in my phone. But from now all crappy temp agencies' numbers are going in my phone at the time I mapquest them. Drove back to the other side of town to their old address, put their number in my phone, and called them.

And as icing on the cake, got a total airhead on the phone, couldn't get a straight answer out of ANY question to her without cutting her off and redirecting her 3 times, and then she'd go off on side paths, totally wasting my time which was short at that point after all the previous turmoil, stops, and driving. I named a restaurant and a spa that was near the new address, and asked where they were in relation to those landmarks. She'd make assumptions like, oh, if you're at so-and-so then let's see, from there.

NO, I am NOT at so-and-so, I am at your old office that has the crappy directions that are WRONG for your new address, there are NO pink flags, and I am asking you (for the third time) what businesses are next to you, on either side of you, or across from you at your new address (you dumbaxx!!). Every time she'd answer one thing in the same breath she'd go off on another tangent, such as "let me take some information from you". I hung up on her. Total idiots. You have to sign up in person, fill out paperwork in person, give them your ID and résumé in person, NOT WASTE MY TIME OVER THE PHONE. You have to do that in person, and in order to do it in person you have find the place first. She is the kind of person who has learned a coping technique of resisting giving out info or answering any direct question unless she can ask you 3 questions first, so she is in control first. Direct questions make her feel out of control, so she resists answering them until you pull the answer out of her like pulling nails. Psycho! Stress.

Did I mention I hate temp agencies. Yep.

Did I mention this one has the word "Professionals" as part of their business name. Yep.

Decided to try to find and visit the new airhead agency later in the week, as I couldn't take anymore today, plus time was getting close to go to the piddly pay job and I still hadn't gotten on the computer yet today. Stress.

Came to the conclusion during this time, that all I can do about the piddly pay job's schedule, is to give them heads up, and give them the info I have, which for their purposes is completely unhelpful and inadequate: but it's all I have, and all I can do. So decided to talk to the mgr in person, she comes in early & leaves early, so I'd have to go now if I was going to talk to her today. Stress.

Drove from Mvlle to the piddly pay job's town, to talk to the mgr, and on my way there my phone rang. Pulled in to the parking lot and listened to voice mail, it was Aerotek calling about a job. Aerotek is a "better", crappy temp agency. I called him back and said he'd called just in time, as I was about to take a crappy job I didn't want (NGK).

NGK is for 3 months, if you last that long; and this job with Aerotek is 1-2 months to cover a medical leave of absence. But it is in an office environment, AND, it is in my professional area, Quality. Definitely interested! Even though all these jobs are crappy jobs, and it's a matter of degree, & I definitely wanted this job.

He read the job description, perfect fit. He said there's one more thing tho, as part of the process I had to meet him first (of course) . . . he was in Huntersville, the town halfway between Mville and Charlotte . . .

Oh geez why don't I just toss a hundred dollars out the window, or pour gasoline on the ground, because I am using up so much gas, and money I don't have. Stress.

My car, which HELLO is important because I'm living in it, is not going to last forever. Stress.

Part time minimum wage does NOT pay for all of this gasoline (PLUS ministorage, phone, auto insurance, etc.) Stress.

But of course I didn't say any of that, instead I said I was on my way, asked for directions, and drove to Huntersville. Filled out their paperwork, met with the guy, he said he was going to meet with the client Wed or Thur and would present my résumé then, and he'd let me know if the client wanted to bring me in for an interview. Well at least that went well.

Drove back, like a ping pong ball, to the piddly pay job, and found myself in their parking lot for the second time that day. Stress.

To talk to the mgr before she left for the day. Stress.

I told her I won't know anything until Thursday at 5, and orientation was 3-4 on Thurs, and work would start the following week, so I was also going to be late coming in on Thurs. The one bright spot is this mgr, who has, all along, said she'd work with me on schedule when I got another job, etc. So I wanted to do whatever I can for her and give her as much notice as possible. Every question she asked, I had to say I don't know yet, and won't know til Thurs at 5pm . . . which is why I was dreading this conversation but there was nothing else I could do.

Left there and had only a little time to before my shift started.

I had no idea how upset I was, until I walked into work, visiting the parking lot for the THIRD time that day; and when I walked into work someone was being an idiot, which upset me for the next 4 hours.

I didn't know I was emotionally fragile, but in addition to all of the above stress, I had been thinking alot about and hurting alot about the hurt and abuse I recently experienced from church people (per previous blogs, through the church people I was staying with, and through church people outside of my hosts). Sometimes those wounds are near the surface and sometimes they're not.

But that day for some reason (was it a full moon Tues?) in addition to everything else going on, I was in the hurt stage of processing it emotionally that day, and the emotions were right at the top and about to spill over.

My piddly pay job is extremely unprofessional circumstances, unprofessional work, unprofessional system, and unprofessional people, EVERY day, ALL the time, so someone being an idiot is nothing new and is the usual, normal burden to carry. So when it set me off I should have had a clue.

On my break I was too upset to eat, went to my car and called my friend in Maryland and cried on the phone. Believe it or not, this is when the light bulb went on that things were not right in my internal world. Finished my shift, and was never so glad for a day to be over.

I appreciate your prayers. So much. I know everyone's life is hard, and mine is easy compared to some peoples', but it's been a hard week and it's only half over.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Hang in there. There is at least some hope on the horizon. I hope you get the job.
    1710 days ago
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    1715 days ago
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    1716 days ago
    I can really feel your stress. Don't minimize what you are going through, cause it is a LOT for anybody to handle. Breaking down crying does not mean you are 'less'. You are a strong, determined woman who has survived almost insurmountable circumstances. You are strong. Never forget that.

    1716 days ago
    It does sound like you are running around "like a chicken with its head cut off." Wow, sorry to hear about the frustration!
    1716 days ago
    hope you get a better job
    1716 days ago
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