Wednesday, July 10, 2013
Hi! Yes I just put a Z in there, trying to be creative.
Crazy days. I worked 12 hour days Mon & Tuesday (7-7). Both nights I came home and BF had made dinner and did the dishes and all. I am SO thankful for him I canít even express it. We bought this ďCooking LightĒ (like the magazine!) premade bake that says ďSometimes even healthy cooks need a break!Ē on the side. It was pretty good and BF could easily make it. I recommend it for those of you that need something like that on hand in a pinch!
Both of my big projects wrapped up last night so I am trying to reorient my brain today. Mexico is in THREE DAYS. I have yet to pack a single thing. Iím starting to freak a little bit, the planner in me is going crazy now that my brain has space to do so. I am starting to get ridiculously excited. I know I should be working out like crazy but Iím accepting myself as who I am and that is who is going to this island and wearing bathing suits and who cares? It can rain the whole time but I wonít be at work or in my daily routine and Iíll never see these people again Ė so yeah Iím going to enjoy myself and not care what people think of my lumps in a bathing suit. I do not want to hold myself back from having fun by wasting energy beating myself up. I also know that food & booze will be had, and that I can come back afterwards and get right back into my planning/exercising/cooking routine. The goal of this trip is really to shut my brain (and phone!) off, spend time connecting with my BF, and FINALLY seeing blue water! I swear it feels like seeing Disney world for the first time Ė BLUE FREAKING WATER. Isla Mujeres is known for reefs, diving, snorkeling and all that. I just canít wait to be a part of it myself. Never thought this day would come!
BF and I have also identified a few possible places to move, so that change will be coming up soon too. We got approved for a seriously cool but expensive place. Again, one of those things that I never thought Iíd do in my life Ė move to some artsy, well protected, clean and quiet place with a seriously awesome gym. We will see what works out though!
If you canít tell, Iíve been realizing more and more lately that I let my brain hold me back from A LOT. ďOh, I donít deserve a vacation like this! How could little olí me live in such a cool apartment? Oh I couldnít possibly buy myself a new shirt, Iím too fat!Ē and stuff like that. WHY?!?!?! Iím trying to SHUT THIS DOWN. Thinking positively is one thing, but holding yourself back? That is just a shame. I am really working on hearing and stopping that little voice.
OH! I finally got the comprehensive results on my heart stuff back from the doc. I DO have extra beats, but they seem to be the harmless kind. So Iím not crazy! Weíre going to keep an eye on it. My doctor wants me to let her know if I experience anything crazy while working out and all. Iím going to get back into the WALKING routine soon and focus on building the speed and distance of THAT before trying to run again. I need to convince myself that walking DOES equal fitness and I donít need to be some marathon runner to feel like I burned some calories. I am going to do some more research and write up an ST plan too. Very important!
All that being said, I havenít weighed myself in a while. I am probably more okay with that than I should be. I havenít been BAD, actually weíve been eating at home a lot, I just havenít been working out. Now I know that my heart isnít trying to kill me and I can get back into it. BF and I didnít even buy groceries this week because of the trip, and I still havenít fallen apart so Iím thinking some of these healthy habits are actually stickiní! BUT Iím thinking the post-vacation weigh in will be a good time to kick myself in the butt again soÖ guess Iíll be there in go mode after next week!
Hope all of you are doing well, and please feel free to share your fave ST moves with me, Iím gathering and planning! Also - any BEACH reads you like?! I'm trying to collect favorite books too! THANKS!