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Wednesday, July 10, 2013

I posted the discussion question from my last blog onto the New Rules for Women FB page, and I immediately got a backlash. Not from the "regulars" on the site (who mostly agreed with me) but from people who I never see posting. And the backlash was interesting.

The backlash was mostly how:
a) The poster (me) obviously has food relationship problems
b) I'm condescending because I gave my credentials

I gave my credentials because I know what OCD is, and I'm not using the term lightly.

And, as you all know, I have BODY IMAGE problems, yes - but definitely not food problems. I love food. I tried to restrict the types of food I ate for like - A MONTH - and couldn't do it. I will count the calories of food, but never feel guilty when I go over my calorie range (maybe if I had felt guilty I wouldn't have such a big butt! hahaha).

I did get defensive in ONE case. Someone posted something like "Well, I have an MA in psychology, and you should have someone examine your food relationship issues". Now, it is pretty damn easy to get an MA in psych - I've written recommendation letters into programs, and the person has been accepted - even though I said things like "This person doesn't understand psychology is a science" because they think it's like Dr. Phil, or the person had only had three psych classes in undergrad.

Not ALL MA psych programs are THAT easy to get into, and some are pretty good. But since this woman got all pissy and posted that publicly on my page - evaluating me in that way is unethical - she obviously knows very little about psychology and ethics and so on.

So I told this one individual to take her dime-a-dozen MA and shove it up her a$$, which then caused a bunch of other people to get pissy thinking I meant them. So I deleted it. Whoops. Oh well.

In any event (and it was an event) I saw people getting VERY defensive over the term "clean eating" - not saying things like "Well, I like it" but saying things like "It's eating WELL, and obviously you're crazy, and I DON'T USE IT in an OCD way, YOU must be OCD" and so on.

Methinks they protesteth too much.

Clearly, judging by how many people FLIPPED THE HELL OUT over my post, it is a VERY loaded term. People who NEVER make a peep on that page were coming out of the woodwork to talk about how crazy I am.

On the other hand, the same post here (plus some extra! you get a bonus) brought NO ACCUSATIONS that I am actually having food issues. Ha, I think I eat more than the men that read my blogs (2000+ calories/day). It brought reasoned responses (some with swearing - haha! yes! - but still well reasoned).

And that's why I love you.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I used my credentials for a very brief time, until someone wondered if I had multiple sclerosis. I'm still not sure if they were being serious or not, but I haven't put the MS behind my name again.

    I think Andrea and Kikki get at the differing reactions to the post, that it depends on the audience reading. When you put it on the FB page, it was out there for people who might usually lurk until something sets them off, and they responded with their self-righteous whininess.

    Here, in this blog space, it's a self-selected bunch, we are the ones who are choosing to read what you have to say, and largely, we know where you're coming from.

    Maybe if you'd put it on a public forum here at SP, you might have heard some of the same backlash you got on the FB page.

    1560 days ago
    I'm not surprised. I back you up girl and some people on here just make me laugh at their ignorance and lack of argument. We all have food/self issues or why the hell else would we be on here!?

    like MISTY_MOUNTAINS said, they are a bunch of wieners! oh wait no thats not "clean" HA!
    1562 days ago
    mmmm I thought it was an interesting question... but you may have lucked out a bit on Spark cuz I have been flamed before.. regardless, I enjoyed the blog.

    1562 days ago
    I agree with Misty Mountains. Well said
    1562 days ago
    B*tch, you crazy!!

    Seriously, though.... people who get super defensive about things like that kill me. They are obviously seriously uncomfortable in their choices. If you've made a choice and want to stick by it and your opinion, then why get so upset?? If someone questions your opinion, it's okay. You don't even have to defend yourself.

    I love also, that you said "discussion question" - meaning you wanted a discussion. Not a fight. Some people just can't help being big babies. Big deal if you brought up your cred, you worked for it and it's not like you're condescending about it. You certainly do not have food issues either.

    What a bunch of wieners.
    1562 days ago

    Comment edited on: 7/10/2013 8:01:36 PM
    I enjoyed your Blog and it had some great information and you was honest of you to share your back round with us . people need to step back and not get so worked up
    thank you for sharing your views . We need to be like thumper Rabbit in Bambi if you can't say nothing nice don't say nothing at all . I hope you keep bloging and sharing your views with us. the delete button works great
    1562 days ago
    I find that people tend to extremely rude and abrasive under the cloak of anonymity.
    1563 days ago
    People on the forums here are VERY defensive and often don't know what they're talking about. I have a problem with a specific forum leader who doesn't read anyone's question before answering. I've been trying to figure out a way to complain to SparkPeople about her. I don't think her answers are helpful at ALL. And she's the FORUM LEADER.

    I don't think you have any problems with food!
    1563 days ago
    Dang! You got blasted for your credentials! Seriously?????!!!??? That's ridiculous and it's good you responded to that, IMHO.

    Ok, I don't have my Masters of doctorate in Psychology, but common sense is certainly important too. And my common sense says for pete sake . . . you're not CRAZY! Not at all. And frankly, even if you were crazy as a bug in a rug, you're still entitled to your opinion! That's what a blog is about . . . expressing your opinions and asking questions to generate a discussion as you did. And I'm sure you didn't have expectations that every responder was going to agree with you, but get real people! If you have a differing opinion you express it maturely . . . not on a personal level!

    Ok, off the soap box, and putting it away.

    1563 days ago
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