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Starting to FREAK OUT ! Scared, yet VERY HOPEFUL

Wednesday, July 10, 2013

Today was a BUSY DAY with the phone.

I got the call from Dr's office who "may" do the amputation of left foot (For those whom aren't reg readers,,,, I have neuropathy very badly,, all hhe blood veins, muscles are starting to gather together on the bottom of my foot,,,its NASTY and HURTS WICKLY !) and so my appoint is ALREADY COMING UP FAST of Next Weds !!! I DID NOT expect it to be so FAST for in Maine,,when you need even BADLY to see a specialist ,,,you HAVE TO wait 2 or 3 months,, USUALLY 3. So that's what I was prepared for, yet I KINDA knew that since I've seen him b4,,,it would NOT take this long.

So yeah,,,, it's starting to happen fast,,, and yeah that DOES FREAK ME OUT !!!! Just in the timing,,,for I WANT IT DONE AND OVER with,,if this is the route he's going to take. For you who are NOT reg readers,,, I've already have had 3 other Dr's say this needs to be done,, including one in Denver , CO where they REALLY KNOW WHATs what though that Dr was UNKIND in saying CAUSALLY "You DO know that ur left foot needs to come off, than ur right foot will be behind it",,,I DO NOT know if this true about the right foot,,,IHOPE NOT for if so ,,,it'll be so HARd on me, yet that foot is hurting as badly as the left,,, if you do not know me,,, I've already had 15 surgs trying to do our best for this foot, with the last 2 being "The last resort" to save it. SO please if your thinking "DO NOT DO THIS ! Get ANOTHER opinion" you can see I've had 3 already.

Does this SCARE ME TO YIKERS??? OF COURSE !! mostly in that I'll get a staph infection (I TEND to CATCH EVERY THING there is f!! ALso and this DOES make me GIGGLE at first,, the fire alarm will go off (I live in a high rise this happens A LOT with buring foods ! GOOLLY !) and I'll NOT think and START to JUMP out a bed,,,and go RUNNIN For the door,,, LOL without the foot,, that's NOT gonna work !! So need to be careful I DO NOT BREAK any bones,,, I have otheoporsis very badly,,, we are looking at daily SHOTS for that !. I can see a cartoon of someone runnin without a foot,,,,,, and many GIGGLING at that with OUT realizing the DAMAGE I could do to myself. Or having to use the Ladies QUICKLY whereas I have IBS also. hmmm the possibilities are ENDLESS !!!

Maybe they have you tie urself to the bed lightly? I had a foot Dr do that,,,so I'd NOT get out of bed quickly. His surg was extensive on me. Though it "sounds strange" it WAS A GREAT reminder to NOT jump out on that foot which was newly done.

We shall see,,,also FREAKING OUT about being in hosp than REHAB !! I DO NOT like EITHER PLACE !! I can 'BRIEFLY Tolderate hosp if I am conked out from a surg,, the day passes without ya knowing it. I DETEST Rehab will give them 3 days OR LESS to come back home,,,,,, on my own. My GD just got a job,,,, maybe she'd sped a little time wwith me,,,and I am FIECELY wanting to be BACK HOME with kitty cat (That's NOT THE REAL Reason,, Izzy will go to Karens ,, she already knows it there,,, but she always sit there at the door wating for me,, HOW SAD !!),,,, I just am SCARED of picking up a GERM !! AND NOT being so comfy and eating my OWN foods.

OK this is that,, and on the Dawg Bite from last week,, the NASTY as EVER bruise of 3"s is now turning color,,, I saw my Dr on Mon,, its still badly swollen,, she's HOPING when the goes down,,,,, I get BACK the total feeling in pinkie nd that side of my hand,,, it HURTS when typing,,,, or doing much of anything else than havin it in the sling and RESTING IT !!! I am NOT so assured now it'll return for the bruise is getting MUCH better,,,I am a FAST heaer on that part,,,,,, just NOT with bones,, those take forever ! The offier today called (FINNALLY !) wants ,e to persue this with a lawyer so she has more power on what can he done with the dog. That's ALL SCARY !!! First to find out if they had home insurance,,, most likely sicne it was a signal fam home,, I HOPE he's UP on his shots,,,I DO NOT WANT the shots.... so hopefully he's OK,,,, I am NOT comfy with that,, for he /she LUNGED at ,e QUICKLY ! We shall find out soon. I told the officer if my hand comes back I do NOT want to persue tis,,, still she wants it ,,cos once a dawg bites,,it WILL again. THANKFULLY I am NOT a small child, though I AM Short which is in part why it was sooo EASY for it,,, ughers !

THANKS FOR READIN and Helping me. I am hearing A LOT "I do NOT KNOW What to say/do" agbout the foot,,,,,, that is ok,,,I DO understand, but I HAVE A LIFE to LIVE After it eals,,,,, hope others can see tis. Though of course I AM FREAKING and SCAREd its for MY TOTAL Benefit,, if we go that way,,,or AGAIN TRY to save it,,,, the other 2 did NOT work. YiKERs !!! We shall see.
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