“Without a noise, without my pride, I reach out from the inside.” – Peter Gabriel
Monday, July 08, 2013
I was totally dragging this morning.
~I stayed up too late (when did I turn into someone who actually needs 8 hours of sleep? Ug! Being 33 is hard! Haha) and was super groggy.
~Heading back to work after a wonderful long weekend was tough.
~A year ago today my furbaby Sophie died very unexpectedly. If you’re not an “animal person” I understand, but she was absolutely our “child” and it was really traumatizing. Deathiversaries don’t usually get to me, and I’m usually fairly present-focused, but this one absolutely has.
Anyway, regardless, I got out of bed when my alarm went off with every intention of getting motivated and then stumbled to the couch where I lay back down. So much for getting up! I’m usually really good with my morning routine, but this morning just felt terribly daunting. On gym days I need to leave the house by 7:30 or so. At 7:15 I started bargaining with myself – “You can always go after work”, “you exercised yesterday and can skip today”. At 7:35 or so I had resigned myself to just skipping. And then somehow, for whatever reason, I suddenly put on my gym clothes, swigged some water, and walked out the door.
I stopped with the excuses. Yes, it’s hot out; no, I don’t feel like it; yes, I did exercise yesterday. Instead I just walked. And then as I started thinking about my Sophie, I ran. I told myself I only had to be gone for a few minutes, but that quickly turned into 30 minutes. A few minutes in I was so happy and so proud of myself for getting going. I smiled at people walking by me, smiled at the ducks, etc.
Nothing has changed. I’m still tired, I’m still not thrilled to be at work, I still wish my tiny orange kitty were waiting at home for me. But I did something good for my body and jump-started my week.
In the end, that 30 minutes this morning made a huge change in my day. Another lesson to be reminded of!