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    KYLAR_STERN   21,149
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Survived a tough weekend

Monday, July 08, 2013

So after two bad weekends with both overeating in social settings and closet binging, I finally got my eating monster wrestled back in its cage. This weekend was frustrating for other reasons than normal little weekend vacations, it wasn't an overabundance of food avaible that was the problem, it's that there wasn't any available and what was, wasn't healthy.

I visited my friends back in college for a fun 4th of July weekend and if I had to sum up their eating habits it would be: skip breakfast: eat some chips for lunch: then maybe a sandwhich or fast food for dinner. Do this for 2-3 days, then order some cheap pizza deal and eat everything. Weekly, I bet their calories come out pretty close to even, but I just felt like crap trying to deal with that and having no transportation to go out for something. I mean, "dinner" for me one night was oatmeal with a scoop of protein powder because that was all they had around, and I didn't feel like eating ramen with a chopped up hotdog. Their idea of a nice cooked meal (They were actually proud of this) was 1lb of pasta with a bottle of cream, butter/vegetable oil sauted onion, and 6 oz of lunch meat spread out over 4 people for the sauce. So basically tons of white carbs, way too much fat, and virtually no protein.

Weirdest thing was, I never once felt that stomach rumbling hunger, even tho I certainly wasn't eating enough. I just felt my energy absolutely gone during the day. I can't believe I used to feel like that all the time. I always used to attribute that to lack of sleep, but now I realise it was 90% proper nutrition.

Then, there were nights we'd come back from the bar and I would actually be hungry and minorly frustrated because I wasn't able to see a bunch of people I wanted. This would have normally been an absolute trigger for my binging and the crap around the house would have been exactly what I'd go for. There was even ice cream in the freezer.

I succeeded tho in just reminding myself of how frustrated I was about my last two weekends and needed to break the cycle NOW, I was able too. Except for the night camping on the beach (which was the only night I actually got a bit drunk, another win) where I had an extra s'more and munched quite a bit on the materials for those delicious bad boys, I didn't really overeat anything. Why was I the one with the supplies on my lap to put the graham cracker and reese's on everyone's marshmallow? haha.

I did graze ever so slightly on stuff. I still need to break that habit, but I get stupid around food I don't normally eat and it's like I want to try it to see if I would like buying it and having it around, even tho I know it's far to sugary for me to actually eat on my own. Stuff like the dark chocolate blueberries I would actually buy I think, they were so good. But why do I feel the need to grab a single, even small, handful of oven fries, potato chips, chewy bars, cheeze its, ect.

But that's a minor thing to work on, and I think having the weekend be so tough made it possible for me to actually not binge. I was rewarded this morning by having my weight down 5 pounds from when I left last Thurs, and only a pound up from where I was before my double binge weekends. Although with the under eating and unhealthy food at that, I definitely noticed a bit of a backslide in the weight room this morning.

Now I'm going to be perfect this week and absolutely love it. Water park this weekend and maybe I'll even like the way I look in the pictures. Not in as good of shape as I've been, but I at least think I lost the bloat finally. Gonna be shallow and do some actual ab exercises this week *hangs head in joking shame
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LAURASDAD 7/9/2013 6:37AM

    I think there may be a writer lurking inside the athlete. Your posts are always engaging and insightful.
Finding fellow travelers along the path is not always easy and when I think back to the first time I lost 100 pounds, I remember having to forego a lot of what I believed to be essential. I didn't eat out or go to bars for many months while I tamed my own beast and, even after it was under control, I would not tempt myself with cocktails (which got very boring after a while - I was always the designated driver).
I admire the way you keep plugging away and tap into the wisdom to see where you've sabotaged yourself.

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HOOKEMBABY422 7/8/2013 8:57PM

    Just think, you're already way ahead of the game (and your friends) by starting your healthy lifestyle now rather than later! You're doing great; weekends are hard for me too, since there is less structure for me during the weekend.

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HFAYE81 7/8/2013 3:32PM

    emoticon Just look how far you've come. This is barely a set back.

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CLRWILLIAMS25 7/8/2013 3:21PM

    Definitely a bummer that your friends don't follow the healthy lifestyle that you've been following. At least you know for next time that you'll need to make a trip to the grocery store before you get there to make sure there's some nutritious food available to eat.
I love s'mores with Reese's cups! It takes the awesome melty-ness to a new level.

emoticon for stopping a binge before it started!

Also, nothing shallow about doing some ab exercises. I did 10 minutes of core exercises every morning when I was at the beach and also did 100 reps before I put my swimsuit on. Shallow? Maybe, but I feel like it helped emoticon

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_MOBII_ 7/8/2013 12:29PM

    Aw, don't hang your head...you did the best you could with what you had to work with! You did a great job pulling yourself out of the binge mode of the last couple of weekends AND on a holiday weekend to boot!

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