On March 1, 2012, I embarked on the most AMAZING journey...the journey to steal back my life from the prison of obesity. I had reached the point where I was literally sick and tired of being sick and tired. I was sick of being trapped in an overweight, out of shape, unhealthy body. I was tired of being in pain, and tired of avoiding people for fear that they'd see how fat I'd gotten. I wasn't really living anymore. I was just existing from day to day.
It wasn't always like that. In 2005/2006, I lost 86 lbs and reached a size 10, which was my goal. But while losing the weight was difficult, maintenance turned out to be even harder! I struggled through maintenance for a year before throwing in the towel and gaining all the weight back..and more! I confess...I lost 86 pounds and gained back 100.
No wonder I didn't want to go out in public and risk running into people who knew me from when I'd lost the weight! My weight loss success had been written about in a local (free) women's magazine. I'd been the top loser on my gyms "Losers Wall." People had come to me for weight loss advice and motivation. And now here I was, heavier than when I started! How on Earth could I ever redeem myself, or rescue myself from the prison I'd put myself back into?
It really seemed like an insurmountable task, to lose 86 pounds AGAIN, plus 14 more! I was overwhelmed at just the thought of it. But on March 1, 2012, I finally found the courage to try again. I knew that I had to forget the weight, though. This time, my focus would be on getting healthy, as opposed to losing weight. So I got a starting weigh in, and then I got rid of the scale.
Iti wasn't easy. I started out by getting rid of all the junk food in the house. Part of me felt guilty for throwing that food away, but I figured it was better to WASTE it (by trashing it) than it was to WAIST it (by eating it.) I stocked up on healthy food and planned out a weeks worth of meals in my food journal.
And then I started working out. My first workouts were with a video game for Wii, called My Fitness Coach. At first, I couldn't get through a 15 minute workout...I'd have to pause the game and rest every five minutes! But I stuck with it, and I gave myself time to get better. Eventually, my time increased, and then I added new workouts. I started doing DDP Yoga and Walk Away the Pounds. When I got bored with Walk Away the Pounds, I started doing Cardio Kickboxing. When I weighed myself again in September (2012), I was amazed and thrilled to see that I'd lost 71 lbs!
I hit a plateau after that. The holidays were a struggle for me, and there were quite a few times when I went off plan and gave in to too much unhealthy food. But I never thought about just giving up. I told myself that every day was a fresh start. Some days were better than others. I was still working out hard, but I wasn't being as careful as I should be with my eating. I wasn't gaining. I was eating just enough to maintain.
I was proud of how far I'd come, but I knew deep down that I needed to keep pushing and go even further. After all, my goal this time is not to reach a size 10. This time, I want to get to a size 8, and I knew I'd never get there unless I got that eating under control!
This month, I have renewed my commitment to myself. I am determined to make July the HEALTHIEST month of the year so far! I have become extremely vigilant about eating healthy, real food...measuring my portions...and tracking, tracking, tracking. I'm also doing a new, more challenging workout; the Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred! Wow, that workout is a butt kicker! It definitely is a tough workout, and I'm so proud of myself for sticking with it. Today was day 7 of level one!
And now, it seems like the plateau is ending! I haven't weighed myself (and don't intend to anytime soon) but I can tell that I've lost weight. Just a few pounds, but hubby has noticed, and I can feel it. Plus, the most awesome NSV happened yesterday. I got dressed and my jeans were loose around the waist! I felt like jumping for joy! (And I would have, but jumps are high impact and I never do high impact moves, lol.) Those jeans were so loose, I was able to take them off without unbuttoning them...they just slid right down my hips when I pulled them! It feels awesome to be seeing and feeling progress again!
This is my journey so far. But really, there is no end, because this is a journey for life!