Friday, July 05, 2013
So I was going to start out this post with a "The food I have the hardest time saying 'no' to is..." but then I realized something. That wouldn't be *A* food; I have a LIST of foods that I have trouble saying "No" to. That list would include:
+ Sharp cheese
+ Soft, fresh bread
+ Cosco Carrot Cake
+ Two Tart cookies
+ Cupcake Jones cupcakes (particularly the cookie dough one)
+ Oreo Cookie ice cream
+ Hawaii's BBQ chips
+ Bagels and cream cheese
If I don't have them around me, it's not hard to say "No". (It's especially easy to say "No" to the Two Tart cookies and Cupcake Jones cupcakes, because I have to drive downtown to get them!) But if they are near me, my mouth drools, I start to make chewing motions, and I otherwise look longingly at them.
Finding out what my tempting foods are wasn't difficult. It's the foods I dream about, I crave for, that I drool over when I am near. The hard part instead is my subsequent reaction to them.
Because of my current weight loss regime, I can't eat ANY of those things. For me, I think this was a good thing; before, I couldn't resist any of those items. Literally. If they were available, they would end up in my stomach. For me, going on the diet program Take Shape for Life gave me great incentive not to have anything to do with them. And when you are first trying to work through your food addiction, complete eradication and removal of these items is VERY important.
It's been almost 8 months since I ate any of those items, and I'm doing OK. Being away from the memories about how "good" they are helps. It also helps that my entire existence does not revolve around getting them and eating them. I've restructured my life so it doesn't include weekend trips downtown for cupcakes and cookies or trips to the grocery store after work for more cheese and BBQ chips.
But when I get off program and slip into maintenance, THAT is when the work will begin. THAT is when I will really have to find another way to hold myself back. And it seems hard, but I think I already have some of the tools in place:
1. Like I said above, my life isn't structured around getting one of my temptation foods. I don't spend weekends making trips downtown that "conveniently" end up in the Cupcake Jones/Two Tarts area. I don't drop by a grocery store to pick up chips and cookies and candies during lunch, and I don't buy loaves of bread and cheese after work for dinner.
2. Closely related to number 1, I plan my meals. I don't have to wonder and fret about what I am going to eat; it's all ready. I don't have to rely on my "hunger" (actually more like my body cravings!) to tell me that I need to have some cookies or cheese; I rely on the time.
3. I am learning when to say "I'm full" or "I've had enough" instead of eating everything in one go. The day will come when I do eat another Two Tart cookie (BTW, these cookies are small, not the ginormous coffee shop saucers that you can buy). And that day, I will eat one or two and be satisfied, instead of eating a half dozen or a dozen.
4. I see where I was and where I am now, and I don't EVER want to go back to 268 pound woman. That life, chained to food, unable to do the things I wanted, was NOT FUN. I am FINALLY becoming the skinny girl I've always known lived inside me. I like this person, and I don't want to lose me again!
5. The food industry WANTS me to eat and eat and eat and eat. That is how they make their money. They don't make money when I am satisfied; they make money by constantly making me want more. Why would I want to "feed" their pocket books with being unhealthy and fat?
6. A lot of the foods I particularly like aren't that good for me. They are filled with sugars, fats, and salts, but also names of ingredients that are unpronounceable and man-made. Do I want to end up like that Twinkie joke, my body "dead", but perfectly preserved in 200 years???
These things I think will carry me through maintenance. But one thing I've learned this health journey is that I AM NOT ALONE! I need the support of friends and family to make it through. So I leave this post somewhat open-ended and with a question for my wonderful SparkFriends, who have supported and encouraged me constantly:
Do YOU have suggestions for how to keep me through maintenance, to keep a healthy perspective on foods and to maintain an appropriate relationship with foods that I find tempting??? What works for you? What are your trigger foods and how do you handle them? Is it possible to eat your trigger foods or do you have to eradicate them entirely from your diet?