Emotions, Fakeness, and Bingeing

Friday, July 05, 2013

I need to be honest with myself. Are you good at rationalization? I can be, though I convince myself that I am not. I am currently in the process of moving my 90-year old mother to assisted living. She has lived with me for 17 years. She does not want to go. I am unable to meet her needs and the daily toll on my emotions is difficult to manage. Though my eating has been okay, yesterday afternoon I realized I am being fake. Fake in that though I talk tough, I hurt inside. I feel as if I am not meeting up to my expectations. I am sad about this move, I am concerned about my sibling's criticism, and I do want my daughter to visit for support. Did I verbalize any of this? No, instead I tried to avoid a binge and lost the battle. Today is a new day, I am going forward one step at a time. Off I go.... :)
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  • DLYNN1113
    Jen, What honesty in this blog... how hard it is for us to openly share with those around us who dont understand the turning to food for comfort. I'm in the process of getting ready to make a difficult move and I don't really want to, but it is a necessity, so I it has been difficult and one of the reasons I joined sparkpeople. Looking for people who understand. This blog touched my heart, as it where I am. emoticon
    1566 days ago
    Thanks for sharing
    1566 days ago
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