Thursday, July 04, 2013
As I logged on this morning, I realized that I have been a member of SP for four years. When I think about all I have learned, the friends I have made, the freely given support, love and appreciation -- I am truly blessed. It has been an incredible learning experience, and I realize that I am ready to tackle the unknown.
The first year or so hanging around here, I bobbled around, I hung out in the Café, made a few friends, explored some teams, and yo-yo'd up and down a bit. Then a little over 2 years ago, something clicked -- I realized that the people on my teams and the friends I had made were serious -- they weren't just hanging out talking about losing weight and keeping it off, they were really doing it. The support, care and advice there were giving was 100% genuine and sincere. These cool people really wanted me to succeed and reach my goals, they wanted to help me, to celebrate with me. That was the day I got off the yo-yo, I started losing again -- and more amazingly I have been able to keep it off.
Thanks to Spark I got down to 181 and have been able to maintain that average weight for over 2 years. Prior to that, the smallest weight I can ever remember seeing on the scale was in gym class in 7th grade -- I was 185. I even fit into my prom dress, and the dress I wore to my stepson's wedding is 2 sizes smaller than the one I wore to my Jr. Prom (I realize that sizes have changed over the years -- but it is still cool).
While I have been maintaining, it has been a great learning experience -- it isn't easy. I always operated under the illusion that once I got to 'goal' life would be easy and perfect. Life has a way of humbling you.
When I first got to a 14 and hit the 180s, I made the decision to maintain my weight -- I am the size I was in 7th grade -- I was/am unable to comprehend the possibility of anything less.
The first time I bought jeans outside the plus section, I cried and couldn't get them into the cart -- even though I had tried them on. When I shopped for my dress for my step-son's wedding I started in the plus-size mother of the grooms section. Still, I will look down and see my wrists and be surprised they are mine, or hang up a blouse and be in shock that I wear that. Sometimes I still see the 375+lb Terr looking back at me in the mirror, and sometimes I barely remember her.
I truly think fear of the unknown stopped me at 181 -- today, I realize that I am ready to stop maintaining and start losing again. I am going for a size 12 -- I have never been there before -- at least not that I can remember. After that, who knows. Thanks to my friends at SP -- I can do anything!
Thank you for the last 4 years!