Yesterday I woke up, stepped on the scale, and was decidedly disgusted that I'd let myself gain back all the weight I'd lost in my early forties. As I approach my 49th birthday, and then the big 5-0, I want to feel healthy and pretty. As a writer, I'm on my back end a lot, which is never conducive to calorie burning, but that doesn't excuse the weight gain. I take time out to exercise; I need to take time out to eat healthier too.
Because I am a writer, I am money-poor. (Inevitably the two seem to go hand-in-hand for most of us in this pursuit.) After a quick search for free dieting resources, I came upon SparkPeople and was grateful to find a handle to grasp as I tackle my weight loss. So I took the steps: sign up, figure the site out, and decide the level involvement I want to have. Good. Check that off my list and let's get going.
Except within three hours of jumping on the SparkPeople bandwagon, life hit me over the head. We found out my son, only 22, has Hodgkin's Lymphoma, a form of cancer that attacks the lymph. The surgeon assures us that, "If you're going to have a cancer, it's the one you want to have. It's very treatable." If it were me who had the cancer, I would take this news as encouragement and attack it head on. But it's my child. And the news is ravaging my mama's heart.
Suddenly, the extra thirty pounds seems inconsequential. But it's not, really. Staying focused on my health and my energy is vital, not only to my own needs, but also so I can be a positive source of energy and strength for my son and the battle he faces. And so I take the next step with the upcoming scans and appointments and also with my own health journey. I will stay focused on losing the weight, so I can stay focused on what lies ahead.
Here's to beginnings-- not all of them to be looked forward to, but every one leading us to where we need to be and to the next chapter in our lives. Let's give it the best we can.