Day 4- the beginning- I am starting to believe I can do this.
Tuesday, July 02, 2013
I am really doing this...yes I have cheated a couple of times but I am only starting on day 4 and I am losing weight and feeling great. I am feeling a sense...no a knowing that I can do this. I have read other blogs about how great a feeling it Is and I think yeah , yeah but I know how they feel. I have lost and gained before but this time feels different. My taste is changing to a little less sweeter. My mind is starting to come around...of course it will still try and bring me down some..." Yeah you have said this before. You always gain it back. You will give up again in a day or two...just like always." Shut up! I am on to your old tricks. I am going to take charge and you had better get it into gear and help or just keep quiet."
No I have not lost my mind. It is our ego that keeps us falling down. We wonder why should I succeed? Who am I to be better? How is my hope any different that a hundred others?
Why not? Why not me? I want to be a catalyst to help others know that it can be done. I want to run along side those that have done it before...not behind, but beside.
You can do it. Come on with me and lets keep pushing...lets keep trying and then lets do it.
No more watching others lose and feeling down. Maybe we lose slower or maybe we yo-yo, but not this time. We are going to go all the way to freedom. Freedom from lugging that rock of fat around. Freedom to move and shop without holding on to the cart as if it were a lifeline.
Freedom to finally get it. I can make me to be who I want to be. I don't have to become someone that I don't want to be. I can be proud of myself.
I can climb that hill that always seemed to high before. I can close my ears to those people who say, " boy look at that. I wonder if she is pregnant or just fat."
I don't need my name up in lights or my picture on a billboard...I just need to feel pretty inside and out. I need to find my inner self and see it. I need to look in the mirror and see who is really looking back at me. I don't need to be a model, just healthy. I know that carrying around this rock, is making me tired and weary. I want to feel full of energy and I have been doing a lot more, in just this month. These 4 days have started me thinking so much. Why did I do this? How did I get this way? Because I didn't care enough about me to let the real me come out. That is the whole thing. I didn't care! Well I do now.
So keep it going and expect miracles because they do happen every day, everywhere and to everybody...not just a few...but to those that start and keep right on going, looking ahead and not behind.
One day you will say.. wow is that me? Yes it is and its beautiful.