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Monday, July 01, 2013

Ok, this is going to sound silly, but I need to deal with it, silly or not.

I'm a little bit scared of getting to my goal weight (120, that' the high end of healthy for my height) and I think I'm sabotaging myself a little bit. I'm afraid that I won't be able to GET to my goal weight. I'm also afraid I WILL get there, and that I won't be able to keep it up, and that all my hard work will be for nothing.

My weight has been a problem for me since my late teens. I never did learn how to eat well and healthily as a kid - either cause mom didn't teach me or I didn't "get" it, I don't know.

I have the usual story with my weight - I gained alot, tried to loose some, succeeded a bit, then gained it back plus some. Repeat adnauseum. I don't want this to be the same.

I'm the lowest weight I've been my entire adult life.! emoticon But instead of being able to be happy and proud, I'm scared.

I'm also scared that my hubby won't find me attractive if & when I loose the weight, He's always gone for bigger, bustier girls. What if he doesn't find me attractive when I loose the weight? I don't know what to do about that.

This is scary. It's a journey, one that you take one day at a time. I've learned so much that will enable me to keep the weight off, just as it's helping me to loose the weight as well. The difference this time is the KNOWLEDGE. I KNOW what I'm doing; I know WHY I got as heavy as I did. I CAN do this! emoticon
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Sometimes we learn to hide behind our weight so we do not have to rub shoulders with people. Maybe that is part of your fear of getting to a lower weight than you have ever been. You need to make being healthy for you as your number one priority, then what hubby feels about healthy you will change. You need to see it that way. Not skinny, but Healthy. That means you will be around longer for you, him and the baby. That is more important than anything. We will be able to do more with him when you are healthy as well. You will be able to be active with your child as he grows and that is really important too. You just need to change the way you look at it, from a positive side not a negative side. There are so many more positives than negatives in loosing weight! Huigs Susan
    1718 days ago
    He may have initially been attracted to the way you looked when you first met, but now he really KNOWS you and finds you attractive in other ways besides physical. I think you'll be just fine. Do what you need to do for yourself and your health and to be a healthy mom, etc and everything will work out :) You are doing great! (And I think most of us do the self sabotaging, etc - just gotta keep fighting!!)
    1720 days ago
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