I am so tired, confused, and getting frustrated
Monday, July 01, 2013
I know I've been working out more over the past few days than I have in a long time. I get that working out will make me more tired. I also get that the heat of the day will add to my exhausted feeling.
So what do I do? Do I just accept that I'm tired and rest? Or do I push through it? Do I go for a bike ride tonight?
I know pushing will burn more calories. Pushing is where I'll see the weight loss happen right?
Over the past few days I've seen the scale spike. I hate to admit it, but it really pisses me off. I'm working my butt off. Instead of seeing progress on the scale, I'm seeing it go the wrong way. Please don't tell me that working out could cause weight gain - swelling, etc. Or salt/water retention. I've used those. But when the scale goes up and stays there for days and days and eventually weeks, you have to face facts. It's weight gain.
I know. It hasn't been even a week yet. But this is not the first time I'm seeing this "pattern". I've been watching it happen over and over and over for 18months now. I work hard. I see gains on the scale. I work harder. I see more gain in weight. I get frustrated and take a day off. Then two. Then... Next thing I know, 3 weeks have gone by, and I'm still stuck here.
I can't let this happen again. That's why I'm considering pushing through this. Getting on my bike and going for a ride. It doesn't have to be far. Just get moving. I think it may be enough to help me convince myself I can do this.
But when will it all be too much? When will it start to be counter productive to my marathon training?
I am doing my best to keep close to a 1,000 calorie deficit every day. Over 1.500 and I'm at risk of starvation mode. Less than 800 and I can't expect to see any progress on the scale.
I am starting to hate this. I used to think I got it. Move more. Eat more nutritious foods. Calorie deficit. Loose weight.
I remember when I was working out to loose the weight before, I honestly felt like an athlete in training. I haven't felt that way in a long time. I'm trying to get back there. Maybe that's what's happening to me over the past few days. I'm getting back there. Back to where my body is exhausted on a fairly regular basis. Or am I "pretending" to be there just to avoid getting more exercise in?