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    BEAUTY_WITHIN   72,088
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You teach me or I teach you?

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

emoticon I once had a friend who had a saying "I act the way you taught me to act." I never really stopped to think about that statement until today, when my doula said, "You teach people how to treat you."
This got me thinking. If we act the way others have taught us to act, then we're not much more than trained monkeys. But even with a habit that's been deeply engrained, we do have the power to stop and say, "No, I choose to NOT do that this time." It may be hard. It may feel impossible. But WE choose what we do.
And in my experience, people don't tend to respect my boundaries unless I'm willing to state them. And I can't state them unless I have figured out what they are. emoticon
Some people really do seem to treat me the way I treat me. For the last couple of holidays, I received several fitness related gifts. The first one was a set of measuring cups/spoons. You never saw someone so happy with measuring spoons! LOL
Next was a fitbit. My last one had grown feet and disappeared. I lamented the loss of it so long, that instead of doing smaller gifts for my birthday, mom got me a fitbit instead. I was thrilled! My aunt got me a running hoodie. Also thrilled.
THis was because I showed them that I was actually starting to care about what I ate, about how I looked, and how i felt.
The last time mom was over, we had sloppy joes for lunch. I finished my sandwich and was still quite hungry. I had tracked for the day already, and I had plenty of room. So I made another. Normally this is cause for a HUGE fuss from my mother. She asked, "Are you having ANOTHER one?" to which I calmly replied, "Yes." She dropped it, which is a huge deal considering that was normally cause for a 20 minute bitch-fest about how I eat too much. emoticon
In some cases, I think we react how others have taught us, but that doesn't mean we have to continue to react the same way. We can act any way we like.
How do you want to act? emoticon

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
JUMPINJULIE 6/27/2013 3:09AM

    Great blog love it.

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BIGPAWSUP 6/26/2013 9:11AM


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TERESAMUS 6/26/2013 8:15AM

    So true

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UWPALUM 6/26/2013 8:05AM

    So true! I love this tidbit of wisdom!!

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NILLAPEPSI 6/26/2013 7:56AM

    emoticon for this thought-provoking blog. I need to make some changes! emoticon

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IMREITE 6/26/2013 12:23AM

    When people know you have standards they may push you in a negative way, but if you stand firm and demonstrate the expectations and eventually they will have no choice but to follow your lead.

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BRANDYLDUGGAN 6/25/2013 11:36PM

    That is an amazing way at looking at things. Good outlook!

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AHAPPYLIFE 6/25/2013 11:08PM

    I agree. A person can not know how you feel or how you wish to be treated until you tell them. Don't be afraid to say that statement hurt my feelings, follow up with I know you really didn't mean to hurt my feelings did you? In old relationships it may be hard to establish new boundries but the door is wide open for new relationships. Those new ones can help you move forward on the old ones when you find out it's really not that big a deal to tell people how you feel. Great that you're moving forward to create really wonderful relationships!!

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PRNCSCUP1-2FULL 6/25/2013 11:05PM

    Here, here! Excellent blog! Good for you!

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UMBILICAL 6/25/2013 10:12PM

  Even a rock can be a teacher.

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