Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Usually, I don't "feel" fat. This is hard for me to explain. I don't know how else to put it, except to say that typically, I don't always feel as heavy and as fat as I am. I see myself in the mirror and I don't think I look like I weigh what I weigh. Maybe I have a better body image than I think I do -- maybe not. When I woke up this morning, just a little while ago, I just FEEL fat. I feel large. I feel wide and doughy. My face feels puffy. And I don't mean to the touch, either, but just sitting here I feel so different today. It's as though I've become completely aware of my size and of my situation. I can't ever remember feeling like this before, being so aware of my extra weight. It's not a good feeling at all. I wish it was a fat suit that I could just unzip and step out of. Wouldn't it be nice if it were that easy? I know, I know, it's not even close to that easy. Believe me. Nobody knows that better than I do. Logically...what do I need to do in order to help this feeling (and reality) start to go away? I need to make changes. I need to eat healthy food, drink plenty of water, and exercise. I need to stay away from junk, alcohol, and inactivity. I know what I need to do. It's high-time that I freakin' do it already.