Sunday, June 23, 2013
Whenever I get it in my head to go on another diet or weight-loss routine to get myself back into the athlete physique I once had, I get really really REALLY excited. Manic doesn't even describe it.
I scour the internet for new trends and fads and things that would afford the most amount of weight loss for the least amount of pain. I get really obsessed with my boxing or jogging or running. My brain dictates that I go on starvation mode, even though I technically should be eating in order to support the activity levels I achieve.
Then, after all that frantic activity for a week, I come down with something like a cough and I stop. OR I get massively drunk and find myself too hungover to be healthy and I stop.
I really don't want to stop, as I want to be HOT. This is the crux of the matter. I'm not your average fat slob with low self esteem. I am your gifted fat slob with confidence! And a sense of humour. Which, I think, translates into a sense of self that most people don't get until they're much older. Go, fellow fatties with a case of the funnies!
I digress. I want to be HOT because I'm already pretty sure of my personality, strengths, etc. I've gotten all the positive attention I could ever possibly want -- I just want my outsides to match my insides. :)